Hi, I’m new on here, hoping to talk and gain strength.
My dad died in March 2022 after a long illness, soon after my mum became unwell and was diagnosed with cancer in sept 2022, she died in December 
It’s only been a month since losing my mum and up to now I’ve been ok, I’ve felt a sense of relief because she is no longer suffering. However today has been very difficult, I’ve been so upset, cried for most of the day, felt unwell. Just wanted abit of advice how to get through these dark days
4 Likes
Hello @CHalford,
I’m part of the Online Community team and I can see that you are new to the community - I’d like to thank you for bravely starting this thread and sharing how upset you are feeling. I’m so sorry to hear about the loss of your mum and dad. Most community members have sadly experienced the death of a loved one and so will understand some of what you are going through.
I’m sure someone will be along to offer their support, but I wanted to share a few Sue Ryder resources with you that might be helpful.
-
Our Grief Guide self-help platform which has information, resources and advice to help you through your grief
-
Our Grief Coach text service, which sends you personalised text support via SMS
-
Our free Online Bereavement Counselling which is held via video chat
-
Our Bereavement Information pages which can walk you through what you are going through.
I really hope you find the community helpful and a good source of support and I also hope you feel you can access more support should you need it.
Thank you again for sharing – please keep reaching out and know that you are not alone.
Take care,
Alex
Thankyou so much 
just being able to say how I’m feeling makes me feel better. Even though my family are amazing it’s always good to speak to other people outside of the family going through a loss
Thankyou xx
Hi chalford sorry for your lost, i lost my dad 2021then my mum in 2022 ,4 months later, i was going through the angry stage of losing my dad when my mum passed, i couldn’t understand why i didn’t grief for mum the same way as my dad, i have had counseling and it’s helped, having to organise 2 furneals so close together then deal with there personal items sort there house out, caught up with me just before Christmas and all i wanted to do was sleep not talk to anyone but life goes on and they wouldn’t want me to be like that, so I cry, listen to music, i would like to say it gets easier but something will happen and I go to ring them and the heartache happens all over again, here if you want to talk, just remember to look amd take time for your self, sending hugs
Thankyou so much for your reply, so sorry about the loss of your mum and dad.
It’s been so hard, as you say to lose both parents so close together seems unfair and very cruel 
the grief is overwhelming isn’t it. I’ve just had my mums funeral, it was a tough day but such a beautiful day too. The days after though have been awful, I’ve done nothing but cry, today is the first day I’ve not cried as much and I’ve actually laughed with friends! Like you my mum would not want me to be like this, but it doesn’t feel any better when I say that!
I’m hoping in time I can think about my parents and feel happy when I talk about them 
I know it’s going to take time.
Always here if you need a chat
The one thing i struggle with is, i can visit my mum’s grave and talk to her, dad was cremation and a week after my mum’s funeral i took my dad’s ashes back home to Scotland to scatter, the promise i made to him, he had been away from home since he was in his 20 , he would go back and visit but I know how much he missed it,