This is my first post, and I have joined as I lost my beautiful precious mom and best friend to Alzheimers in May 2025. I had thr privilege and luxury of being able to care for her at home right till the end and had the blessing of every single day being with her and holding her. Now though I feel totally and utterly lost. She was my world and my best friend, we did everything together, had holidays every year the two of us and then full family holidays. My daughter was born a year before mom’s diagnosis, but their bond was incredible, and mom recognised us both right till the end. I have really struggled to find my way without her, and whilst I feel her constant presence, I just feel so lost, and if my world has crumbled. This has been harder as whilst caring for mom, my dad’s health suddenly plummeted, and as mom died, dad was taken into hospital and I had to sign a DNR for him. While I was arranging mom’s funeral, I was also being prepared by the hospital that I may lose dad as well. On the day of mom’s funeral I had to collect dad from hospital so he could attend, but he had no understanding of what was happening. My husband and friends were amazing, but I truly needed my parents, or at least one of them. Thankfully dad pulled through, but is classed as palliative care, and with a condition that can cause him to drop at anytime. I am also his full carer. I have changed jobs to give me more worklife balance and flexibility, and also give me as much time as possible with my daughter, hubby and dad. At night though the grief and loneliness really hits, how do people find themselves and move forward after losing a parent? I am really struggling.
Hi @Sarld77,
Thank you for bravely reaching out. I’m so sorry to hear about your mum. It sounds like you had a really special bond with her, especially caring for her through Alzheimer’s, and it’s completely understandable that you’re struggling and feeling heartbroken and lost without her.
Dealing with your grief while also caring for your dad is a huge amount to be carrying. It makes sense that your loneliness and grief feel heaviest at night when you have so much to deal with during the day.
You are not alone. I’m not sure if you’ve read through our Losing a parent category. But there you can connect with other members who are living with grief after losing a parent.
I’m sure someone will be along to offer their support to you. In the meantime, you might find these Sue Ryder resources helpful to read.
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Our Losing a parent page talks through some of the emotions you may be experiencing
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Our Grief Guide self-help platform which has information, resources and advice to help you through your grief
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Our Bereavement Information pages which can walk you through what you are going through
I hope you find the community to be a support to you. Take good care and keep reaching out 
Dear Sarld I am sorry to hear your suffering. You sound like an amazing daughter looking after your parents with such love. I’m glad you have family to support you through such rough times. When my wife lost her mother it took her a long time to come to terms with it as they were so close. We found a therapist that helped her and eventually she found peace. When my wife died in my arms on Christmas day her last breath was a call to her mum. I hope she is in her arms now in heaven. I hope you find some solace here where everyone understands the pain of a bereavement
Wishing you all the best and sending hugs
Tom
Hello Sarld77, so sorry for the loss of your mom, and sad to hear that your dad is in palliative care..you sound like such a caring daughter, ..im glad you do have support around you, it is much needed when we’ve lost a loved one..take care and God bless you and your family. 