Losing my child and never understanding why.

[Amelia-Rosemummy]

So in 2021 i lost my 1st born child. My beautiful daughter was born sleeping when i was 37 weeks pregnant. We had no warning, no reduced movements. She was very active the night before even made a joke comment to my fiance, ‘shes trying to break out’. Little did i know how true that statement was. Life shattered and heart in tatters.
After everything was done after someone has passed, all the tests and procedures they carry out. I was never given a real reason as to why she passed so suddenly.
This has always been something i can’t move past. If there was no reason, was I the reason. Was it somehow my fault? Did i move, bend, eat something i shouldnt have? Three years have pasted and everyday i have a new reason in my head, like im trying to convince myself more and more i was to blame.

I just wanted to find out if anyone else is in this situation?

[Seaneen]

I’m so sorry to hear about your beautiful daughter, @Amelia-Rosemummy. That is devastating.

You are not alone. You might want to read this thread in which @Sammi and @MyJosie86 talk about their experiences.

Stillborn at 8 months

At 8 months I was told my baby had no heartbeat, I gave birth two days later to a beautiful little girl ( we didn’t know the sex until then). Yesterday , 12 weeks to the day, I was told there was no reason to be found for the death and for some reason this almost hurts more!? Anyone else been through or going through this ?

Maybe you can connect with each other?

I hope you find the community to be a support to you. I know that some of our members who have experienced baby loss have also found these organisations to be helpful in coping.

• Sands - Stillbirth and Neonatal Death Society have lots of support on their website.

• Tommy’s support anyone with the loss of a baby. They have a helpline on 0800 0147 800 or email midwife@tommys.org. They also have a baby loss support Facebook group.

Please keep reaching out and take care,

Seaneen