Losing my daughter

My daughter passed away on 9th January 2022 after a few months illness which turned out to be metastatic carcinoma of the unknown primary, I have no idea what that means. She was only married in 2021 just before summer, she was 30 years of age and had 3 lovely children 1 girl and 2 boys who are my grandkids, I miss her loads and wish she was back as children are not meant to pass away before the parents, I’m in disbelief and in a daze and finding it hard to talk to my partner about how I feel, I have it in my mind that I did not protect her and get her better even though cancer is a nasty thing to go through as I had a partial kidney removal in May 2021, I don’t seem to be able to cry just yet as I feel I have to be the strong one to hold the family together and to make sure the grandkids are looked after along with her husband, I have not cried and I know grief can hit people later in life out of the blue, her funeral is coming up soon but I don’t feel like my usual self at the moment, I know when my mum passed away it hit me hard and I started drinking heavily to cope bit I don’t want to do that now, I don’t sleep properly I can hardly concentrate on things that I am doing, I just feel lost and do not know how to cope … :disappointed:

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Her funeral is 22nd February 2022 and her birthday is a week later on 2nd March it’s going to be hard for me on both days as on her birthday we used to enjoy doing things

So sorry for your loss. Its so unfortunate. Loss is difficult. I lost my mom three weeks ago so unexpectedly. She was only 58. I’m heartbroken and devastated. The only things which help me are reading posts on this site and talking to her.
How are her kids coping up? It must be so so so difficult for everyone.

@MummasDaughter the oldest one is 11 she has took it badly :cry: my daughter’s 2 boys are still young and knows mummy has gone to heaven, they keep asking questions and we try our best to answer them, it is so hard xx I’m so sorry to hear about your mum hugs goes out to you xx

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Oh nige51 so deeply sorry for the loss of your beautiful daughter .theres no words to make you feel better your in shock such early days .my heart goes out to you and your family …i lost my son april last year to sarcoma metastases. He had a pain i yop of his leg .when we found out it was everywhere . His birthday is the 12 th march . He was just 25 . Theres no answers your poor grandchildren im deeply sorry .on this site you should go on the topic lost son at 27 lots people talk on there people who lost sons and daughters . Just come on and say anything .its a very lonely thing to go through we all here in the same boat hugs zoe

@Zoe9 I’m so sorry to hear about your son my heart goes out for you and your family, my daughter’s birthday is 2nd March a few days away and I’m still in shock, my daughter lasted about 4 months too before passing away and myself and my partner cannot believe it happened so fast, we had her funeral on 22nd February 2022 and now I’m making preparations for bringing her ashes home and mounting them on a shelf next to where she loved sitting on the sofa it basically was her seat, I’m going to shield the urn with a sheet of plastic so it do not get knocked down, it will get easier but it will also take time as we spent 30 years with her xxxx

So sorry for your loss. My Son’s funeral was in September and two weeks later it was his birthday. I memorialized his Facebook page and wished him a happy birthday there. I have just posted a Happy St. David’s Day post with daffodils as his friends still follow his page xx

People say time heals its the worst thing that any parent can go through .sam found out jan the 13 last year he was gone april 27th it is such a shock our babys gone before not right . Sam lived at home i miss him so … i try to keep busy and live this new life without him all i can say keep posting but go on lost son st 27 so many talk on here .it has saved me so many times people on here get me . I have sam in a urn a teardrop shape so it llooks like a ornament .i have a daughter shes going to be thirty .they was so close she has three children .shes lost without sam . Look afteryourself and your family its very raw . Grief is like a rollercoaster .and men are allowed to cry .you need to let your grieve out .take care big hugs zoe

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So sorry for the loss of your son. Life is cruel . Its so shocking . Look after yourself .small steps thats all we can do x

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@Cemoore I’m so sorry for your loss my heart goes out for you x big hugs

Oh Nige so so sorry. She was so young with children to . I’ve been really struggling like yourself lost Laura last July last couple of weeks I’ve been contacted by compassionate friends who have all lost children. Have to say it has helped a little. Sending you love & prayers :two_hearts:

@Maggie8 I’m so sorry to hear you lost your daughter my heart goes out to u with hugs xx its now coming upto 3 weeks since her funeral and 2 weeks since it would of been her birthday, both days I found it hard and to be honest I still find it like I’m stuck in a dream or another world :cry:, I still haven’t cried and I know it will hit me when I least expect it, I have tried talking to friends and family, I sit out in the garden as my daughter used to do that when she visited us, just sitting on the bench watching my koi or watching the kids play, we used to sit and look at the clouds seeing what shapes they make, I still do all of that now, but I guess that’s my mind relieving the memories I have got and the good times we had, she was always dad’s girl even though I have another son and daughter, she was dad’s number 1 as she made a go of her life and she had 3 wonderful children who I adore so much and always will especially her youngest son who reminds me of myself when I was little, my daughter will always be in my mind and in my heart for ever and ever, I just miss her so much xxxxx