Losing my gorgeous wife

My beautiful wife was my lover, my best friend, my everything. Sadly she passed away 14/11/23 after a valiant 4 year battle with MSA, somehow I feel like we both started on a bereavement process way back when her diagnosis was changed from Parkinson’s to MSA and we didn’t have a meaningful prognosis as there is no telling what path it will follow.

She was able to get some counselling last year from Sue Ryder which was helpful. Her Christian faith was a comfort to her at times other times she would ask “Why me ? What did I do to deserve this? “ and I couldn’t answer her questions!

It still feels surreal as though I’m looking for road signs, but don’t know where the road is going or how long it is !

I can hear her in my head “ Can we put the Christmas tree up at the weekend and get the outside lights on “. So that’s my task at the weekend to do as she would have wanted to make her happy and proud


Hello @Cat_fan ,

I’m so sorry to hear about your wife. It sounds as though things are very difficult for you at the moment and you are feeling overwhelmed, even though you feel like you started to grieve 4 years ago when she was given her diagnosis.

I’m sure someone will be along to offer their support, but I wanted to share these links with you to help you with your grief.

You might already be familiar with our other Online Bereavement Support services, but if not, you can find out more about our Online Counselling service, our Grief Coach text support service, and our Grief Guide self-help tools by visiting the link.

You may also find the following helpful

Take care - keep reaching out,

It’s really early days for you, just keep talking some days it helps other days nothing helps. Big hugs

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I feel your pain. I lost my Wife of 31 years to Cancer on the 7 /11 / 23 after a 16 month battle. She was also a Wife, best friend and soulmate & my whole World is shattered without her.
I’m struggling everyday to see the point in carrying on now she’s gone & would gladly accept leaving this earth if it meant that i could be with her again for eternity.
I have a wonderful Son & Daughter that have both been an absolute rock to me since her passing & I’m amazingly proud of their strength since losing their Mother.
I take comfort from knowing that she is now suffering no more pain & is at peace but i feel so angry & cheated by life, I cannot bear the thought of celebrating Christmas without her so will be keeping a low profile mostly.
I agree with your assessment of it all feelings surreal & i keep praying everyday that it’s some bad dream that I’ll wake up from but i know deep down that it isn’t.
I’m in my mid 50’s & can’t at the moment look forward to however many years i have left sitting on my own wallowing in grief.
I know people will say that my Wife wouldn’t want me to be this way but i can’t control how much of an effect grief has on me, all i can do is deal with it one day at a time & hope that the pain & heartache lessens over time.
I am truly sorry for your loss my friend xx :broken_heart::broken_heart:

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Some days I like to keep myself busy with friends and family and other times I just want to stay home alone just and reflect on things ! Just me and the furry one.

It was nice to see two of our lovely friends earlier today and catch up,

I don’t have to talk or answer questions or listen to advice or opinions on what. I need to do. All he needs is a fuss and a treat, no explanation.

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