Losing my husband he’s only 49

My husband has motor neurone disease it started when he was 40 years old but only got diagnosed 2 years ago . He was so fit and full of life now he’s totally bed bound and can’t speak . I have watched this awful disease eat away at him and I feel so sad all the time ! It’s heartbreaking and lonely and more difficult than I could ever have imagined . I just can’t think of a life without him in it … I was told he wouldn’t make Christmas and he did then in March I was told he had days and he fought it again but I can see he’s getting weaker and I know that day is coming where I have to let him go … I feel robbed of a life together I never expected to be a widow at 40 and feel my life is over too … is this normal in these situations? Is there a life after losing your partner

Hi Kerry,

So sorry to hear about your husband. 49 is no age.

It can be very difficult when someone is terminally ill, and you see them getting worse and getting close to death. My amazing dad had renal failure and it was very sad seeing him deteriorate. It must be truly awful that your husband has now reached the stage where he cannot even speak, what can I possibly say to make you feel better? Probably nothing, other than you should be so proud of both your husband and yourself for the courage you have both shown.

I can’t answer whether it is normal to feel that your life is over, as I have not gone through this scenario, maybe if you post the question in the “Losing your partner” section, other people who have lost their partners will read your post and will be answer.

In the meantime, I can only hope and pray that whatever time your husband has left, you and him can spend it together in the best way possible.

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Kerry 3 months of losing my husband your emotions will be like a roller coaster I had 3 days with Mick when told his life was ending I can’t lie I can’t see my future ever been the same again. What ever time you have left with your husband cherish it. Me and Mick talked a lot he told me to carry on with my life easier said than done. I have 2 grown up children and a granddaughter that gets me through sending love xx

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Hi Kerry. I’m so sorry. I’m 49 and lost my wife of nearly 23 years on 28 may. This was sudden and only had 2 days after diagnosis with her.
Like you I feel my life is over. I go to bed every night hoping to not wake up. But I am still here. For some reason.
Unless experienced loss like this no one can understand the pain you go through which is undescribable.

You are also so young to lose your wife I’m really sorry for your loss I know the pain you will be feeling .
I hope we both find a way through this painful journey. It’s truly heartbreaking x