Hi there, my husband died just over three weeks ago. I thought I was doing okay, I have the morning grief and then get better and the afternoon grief hasn’t been so bad for the last few days but now I am sitting here in tears, wondering what the point of me being here is without him. I just want my husband back, nothing else matters. His funeral is next week so I must attend that but after that. Where do peoples souls go when they die because I just want to join him
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I am not able to tell you where there souls go , but truly believe that one day I will definitely see my soul mate again , It’s been 7 months since my partner of 40 years passed away with out warning in front of me, My heart hurts every day, I have learnt to take each day hour by hour and to go with what ever the feelings I’m in and know that it’s ok to hurt , and ok to feel ok , and angry and sorry for myself but it’s ok . The evenings and weekends can be really hard but I promise you, you will get thru it , I know it doesn’t feel like it now but you will, as we all here have been and are going thru this and are here to support and hold you in our hearts 
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Thank you for your lovely message and I am sorry for your loss.
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@Janet57 so sorry about your husband.
I lost my wife on the 8th March and I’m still crying every day, sometimes continually.
I had her funeral on the 2nd April, however I’m also having her ashes interned in the church, in Wales, where we got married in 1967. So it’s two funerals for me to cry at.
Grief is so hard and can affect people in differing ways, however what you say seems to be quite common. Time is not a healer, but the acceptance of how grief affects you does appear to get easier.
As @Ter suggests, take each day as it comes and remember it’s ok to cry and hurt.
I will never get over the loss of my wife or never forget her, however, I also want to spend as long as I can with my children and grandchildren.
You take care
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I’m so very sorry for your loss I lost my husband 3 months ago he was 58, an I totally feel the way you do, work as kept me busy but when I’m home I break down an like you I feel the same way that why should I be here an carry on without him, as I can’t see a future without him, I totally feel guilty for carrying on, I have to push myself to get up in the morning, but I no my hubby wouldn’t want me to be an think like that an as I have a son as long as I get up everyday for him, taking each day as it comes, I do believe there is somewhere they go after they leave us an I no I will see my hubby again one day I truly believe that
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Someone here mentioned a book by Jan Warner called Grief, Day by Day.
Came from Amazon yesterday, so only just started reading it, but it does seem helpful
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My husband passed away in July 2023 aged 60,
I still have bad days but also have good days.
Take baby steps, do small things each day and dont rush yourself. I still have his ashes at home as my 3 kids cannt agree on a day to all be together to put them in his plot (they all live in different parts of the uk), the headstone is in place but im happy to have him here where every night I tell him about my day.
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Dear johnr
I am sorry for your loss, it is very early days for you too. As you say you have another funeral to attend. I like the thought that your wife’s ashes are to be interred at the church that you got married in and where your married life began. I hope it all goes well.
My husband is being cremated but I will bring his ashes home so that when I go they can be scattered together. We got married in a registry office.
We didn’t have children but my husbands family have been very supportive and they will be coming to stay with me on Saturday until after the funeral.
Grief is just dreadful. We had 38 years of marriage and then suddenly that one person who you saw every day is no longer there.
I have ordered from Amazon the book that you had ordered so thank you for letting me know about it.
Take care of yourself and sending you good wishes.
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Early days -2 weeks - for me too. I can’t bear sitting downstairs on my own of an evening so ending up in bed ridiculously early. I hope for our sakes things start to make sense because I don’t feel there is a purpose to life at the moment. I hope your funeral goes as good as it can. We had talked about a direct cremation and said we both want that so at least I don’t have to put myself through that. I am still awaiting a post mortem result as he suddenly and unexpectedly died in front of me. Thank goodness for forums like this where we can share. My best wishes and strength to you. J
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That was me I’m glad you gave it. I read a little each day and highlight bits that I think I’ll need or relate to me. I too go on her Facebook page grief speaks out which I found some form of comfort in to.
Of course none of these things bring our loved ones back but help in their own small way
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Thanks. I’m having a double plot in the church memorial garden as well, so we will be together again.
I knew my wife for over 60 years and it would have been our 58th wedding anniversary in September, so yes, it is dreadful,
Hope the book helps and take care
Hello everyone,
It’s been six months since my husband died unexpectedly when I was out the country. I have cried every day since but it does get a little easier. Day by day, hour by hour.
My lovely husband’s ashes will be all over the place, some in the Netherlands where our son lives, some in London with our daughter, some in Cornwall at my in-laws place, some with his walking friends in Scotland, some with me and some at our allotment. Shock does terrible things to your body, I now nap so much more.,something my husband excelled at and I didn’t like. It’s healing and that’s what we need.
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Sorry I forgot, but thanks. I look at the Facebook page as well
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I’m the opposite I used be one to lay in and my husband the early riser now that’s me.
Stay strong each day x
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I bought a book.Its ok not to be ok by Megan divine.I have to retead some paragraphs because its hard to take in ,my grief brain,not the book.
Thetes a fair bit in it that i can relate to but im 10 months along since i lost Allan after 34 years together. He died in 11 weeks of pancreatic cancer and i still can’t believe it.
I go on the Sunday zoom @7.30 and that helps because we all get it and are forced into this horrendously awful club that none of us want to be in but it makes me feel less isolated.
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What is the Sunday zoom at07:30?
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I was about to ask that as well.
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@Heartbroken12 and @Punto theres a lady called Karen on here and she set up an online chat Sunday’s at 7.30-8.10pm
If you message her she’ll add you.
Its good to talk even if its online
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Do you have details please
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Did you contact @KarenF to get the details it may help us
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