Here it is again the nightime where the world is shut out and I am on my own again I hate this i hate bieng on my own nobody here no friends what are they no family they all want there own life this is me tears running down my face feeling like crap and I do not want to cope.with this any more I am sick off feeling like this sick of feeling lonely and bieng on my own sock off all of it I wish I had.a friend just one who would tell me.the truth I hate is when people lie to me and I find out what is the point my one and only best friend has gone my husband paul he would always tell me the truth he never ever lied to me and I never ever lied to him but now I am on my own with no one 
and I will always be like that I know I had my happiness 44yrs of it and now there is no more happiness for me it’s all over my bows where till death us do.part and now death has done that and I cannot.see a way out of this horrible le tunnel I am stuck in I have waited 5yrs now.and nothing there will be nothing ever again for me so please do not make me wait any longer let me gi and be with my best friend my husband and my only lover let me go to be with him and be happy again this world is not for me not on my own so let me go and be with my best friend husband and lover I cannot stand this anymore it’s not.for me
Sarah