Morning @Tinkerbell3
I am sorry for your loss
What you are experiencing is normal in the early stages of grief is normal. The first months are horrible. Slowly the fog begins to lift and you will have better days and difficult days . Sadly nobody understands until they go through it ,
It’s 10 months now since I lost my husband suddenly to a heart attack.
I hope you have family and friends to support you .
There are a bunch of l
supportive people on here who all understand. Post when you can.
As you said it really is one day at at a time
Keeping busy helps
Look after yourself
Dear Tinkerbell I am so sorry you are suffering so much. My wife died seven months ago and the pain when she died was unbearable. Nobody realises just how horrendous losing your loved is until it happens. You should take whatever support is offered, you are going to need to look after yourself the best you can to get through the next few months. Things will improve bit by bit but those first two or three months are the worst. I hope you find some solace here where everyone understands the pain of a bereavement.
Hello @Tinkerbell3
I am so sorry to read about your loss and the grief you are suffering.
To repeat a well worn phrase it is very early days and the shock of your loss will make everything difficult.
I lost my wife suddenly to a heart attack in December 2024, after 48 years of marriage, and I’m still trying to work out what has happened to me.
For me the problem is one of identity. We were together 49 years, married 48, and for all that time we were a couple. What am I now? I definitely don’t feel single.
Nevertheless, somehow, I’ve survived the 19 months or so since I lost my wife. I’ve done that by taking it, as you say, day by day or sometimes hour by hour.
The name of the game is survival and in the early days you deal with what is essential and leave everything else. There will be arrangements to be made and paperwork to be completed. You may not feel like doing it, but the benefit of ‘the essentials’ is that they are a useful distraction.
Try to eat small regular meals, even if you don’t feel hungry, keep hydrated and get what sleep you can. I remember taking little naps during the day when I couldn’t sleep at night.
If I can I’d like to offer you a little bit of hope. Whilst I lost my partner and best friend back in those dark days of December 2024, I never felt I had lost my soulmate. From the outset I felt my wife’s spirit was still with me. I never really thought about spiritual signs before but they soon started appearing. I dismissed them as coincidence at first, but once I’d noticed them they became unmistakable. She even helped me plan her funeral, but that’s another story for another day. Just keep an open mind, you might be surprised.
First priority though is to look after yourself. Second priority is keep posting on this website because just putting your thoughts on the screen helps calm the mind.
