Is this what its really all anout whenyou lose you husband /wife/partner this i my life now where there is nobody to talk to all day these are the longest days of my life without my husband i feel i have no purpose in life anymore my phone never rings anymore it was always busy when my husband was here and my landline silent to nobody rings to see if i am ok i could be dead for all they know i am not scared of dying just doing it on my own and nobody caring i never knew my life meant so little to them anyway thats my day everyday nothing changes
Sweetlady
Hi Sweetlady, Can relate to the loneliness even though my son is with me I feel so alone. The silence is deafening. Sorry you are struggling. Happy to chat here if that helps…
@Sweetlady I find myself in a similar situation. I am coming to grips with it, finding purpose is the hardest. It may be easier for me, as I have been living alone for 9 yrs now, since my husband died, so there is routine to fall back on, but I recently lost the man who had since connected me to the world. My lover, my best friend, so I now am thoroughly disconnected. It is scary, I know. No one would notice for quite awhile, if I died. So I am very careful, and take care of myself and pay attention. I think that is the first thing, take care of yourself, that is your purpose for now. I’m doing my usual gardening and house maintenance tasks, on autopilot, also a purpose. I’m hope you’ll find your peace and your purpose Hugs Cindy
I can relate to what you say. I lost my long term partner 7 years ago first with Parkinson’s which changed him for many years and then with his passing.
I then went on to meet a guy who like you opened up the world again but only for two n half years before his sudden death in front of me in March 2025.
It’s been devastating and confusing because I only grieve for him, not for my long term partner.
We didn’t live together so I have lived alone and have fallen back into that but it’s tough because he was my everything to be honest.
Never felt so loved before John came along.
Filling that void is hard but I’m lucky to have good family n friends.
@Mitzi1 Our situations are very similar. Your husband had Parkinson’s. Mine had Alzheimer’s, or Parkinsonism or Lewy body dementia, depending on the doctor. We both lost our husbands before they passed, we mourned the relationships before the death and so afterwards, we got on, and no, I didn’t feel like this. I was disoriented, slightly crazy, trying to sort out life etc. but I didn’t feel like this. I too am only grieving for Ron, though it has opened old wounds from Roys death. One letter!
Same, Ron made me feel really loved. He died unexpectedly, the last three weeks were bizarre, too confusing to relate. I am so sorry your John died in front of you
Ron was my ground, my safe and sound, and now pfft! I’m glad you have good family and friends. I have no family, a few friends. I am closing a chapter of my life, and the book will end soon enough. Good to connect. We think we are alone, our situation unique, but no.
Hi Sarah, sorry you’re feeling like this again. To be honest even when you have family who check on you the loneliness is always there. I’m just back from lunch with family and I’m alone again. I find the days very long especially when I’m on a downer.. I knew that it was going to be a bad day when I got up this morning.
Can you not explain to someone that you feel vulnerable and perhaps ask them to phone you daily, just to check you’re ok? Tonight I ll watch some TV and play a game on my phone to pass the time. It’s a terrible situation we’re in but just have to plod on through it. Take care.
@Norma1@Mitzi1 That was why Ron was so precious. We lived far apart, but at the beginning he said, I’ll call at 1 and 8 every day! What man ever says such a thing? And why? To make sure I was not out w/ someone? And he did, like clockwork until his death. He got me through those long lost years. We saw each other about 4 times a year, but we were so deeply connected. I thought we’d eventually live together. I thought we had time. He was younger. And now, I am facing the void, but I’m beginning to think I’ll be alright. You will be too!
Sweet lady, I completely understand. I’m 15 months in after losing my loving husband of my life for 46 years, met him when I was 21. Daniel was my safety net, my partner and teammate together for everything. I’m trying to keep up our house and garden which he did all of it, I took care of the finances and was babysitting daily our youngest grandson at our home when he died. I’m just so unhappy, can’t honestly believe it.
I want to travel to which I can’t imagine without him, I tried 3 months ago: was to sad!
Hi gumby
I have been in this for nearly 6yrs and it does not seem to get any eaiser there is still a lot of things i cannot do on my own i cannot go.on holiday his family took me to belfast last September and that was the first time on a plane without him and they new it and they also new that i had just been diagnosed with fibromyalgia so when i got up.in the air and looked out my window i apoligised to him for going without him and then his gamily dumped.me in the hotel as of my back and bieng to slow for them i felt.totally lost and qanted to come.home if it had not have been.for.my nephew, brother and friend telling me to.stop bieng silly as i was looking forward to it which i was until they did that and now i feel.iits to hard to go anywhere without him i miss him so much i met him on a blind date set up.buy his friends that lived in my atreet and new my family that was in 1975 and got married july 1976 would have been married 50yrs this july and missed him.even more anyway enough about me
I am so.sorry to hear of your loss and i know how hard all off this is you can talk to me anytime you want to and i mean that
Take care
Sweetlady
