Losing my mum suddenly

I lost my mother 8 months ago on May 19th 2018. My mother had her ailments but nothing was suggesting her sudden passing. It was 12:45pm and my dad came to my house to say there was a leak in the house and he could not get in. I went over and climbed through her bedroom window. As I saw her handbag on the bedroom floor I knew she was in there and something was seriously wrong. As I made my way to the bathroom I saw her lifeless in the bath tub. She died of a sudden heart attack aged 55. Since then I have been struggling to make sense of the world. I have a constant knot in my tummy and can’t be bothered with looking after myself. I miss her so much daily and although some days I will feel ok, more days than not, I am not so good. I know it will get better but wanted to know how others have coped with their loss. What mechanisms did you use? How long did it take for you to feel normal?

Hello Caldecottm,

I’m incredibly sorry to hear that you lost your mother in May. You mention this was sudden, which must be very hard and it’s understandable that you’re struggling to make sense of the world now.

I’m sure other community members will be able to share what mechanisms have helped them, but in the meantime we have a couple of articles on our website that may be helpful to have a read through:

How long does grief last? https://www.sueryder.org/how-we-can-help/someone-close-to-me-has-died/advice-and-support/how-long-does-grief-last

How can I cope with bereavement? https://www.sueryder.org/how-we-can-help/someone-close-to-me-has-died/advice-and-support/how-can-i-cope-with-bereavement

Hopefully there’s something in these articles that resonates with you. Do keep talking to us as long as it helps.

Take care,