Losing my nan to Covid

Losing a grandparent
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Hi everyone, I’m new to the site - came across it when looking for support with how to deal with the loss of my nan.

My nan caught covid looking after my auntie who was terminally ill with brain cancer - my auntie had a recent fall and was on a covid ward during her time at hospital when she returned home with the carers my nan was adamant she would spend her last days with her. However, on December 23rd my cousin tested positive for covid and this scared my nan so she got a taxi home. Previous to this she wasn’t really taking good care of herself - not eating or drinking properly and taking her medication. I ordered her a home test kit on the 24th December, but she didn’t understand how to use and didn’t send it off correctly which meant we couldn’t track her results… (I live about 150 miles away) The next few days my nan was in agony of back ache and had the ambulance out to her twice who checked over and said she was fine, but was definitely dehydrated.

On the 3rd time she called an ambulance they took her in to hospital - we couldn’t get through to the hospital and later we found out she hadn’t been placed on a drip or given any oxygen for 3 days. On the 3rd day of her stay she was transferred to another hospital and placed straight into ICU. 4 days later she passed away.

I feel completely heartbroken to lose my nan this way… I always knew it would hurt whenever she went, but to lose her to Covid which could have been avoided is killing me. I feel like I’m tormenting myself thinking of everything different we could have done… I feel really angry and the pain I feel isn’t anything I’ve ever experienced before. Will this pain ever get better ?

Sending love to anyone who has lost someone to covid - until you’re in the situation yourself you have no true idea what people are going through. My heart is aching and broken. I really miss my nan… she fought so hard bless her…

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Im so sorry for your loss it sounds like you have had a devastating time recently. I lost my mum in nov to covid it is a terrible thing to die of especially when people are alone in hospital at the end. It might be an idea to speak to your gp as you have suffered a terrible shock. I hope you can find peace, it will take time, be kind to yourself x

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Thank you for your message Jackie. I’m so so sorry for the loss of your mum :broken_heart: I will definitely look into speaking to GP. I’ve also found a charity which is the Sudden Bereavement Helpline for anyone who may also need this - 08002600400. I think how sudden and unexpected it was is making it difficult too…

Xx

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