I lost my beautiful nanny on the 30th of December 2020 , that night it happened I have totally blocked from my mind as it was so traumatic , I really didn’t think we would lose her for some time , she had her health problems like normal 71 years old, my nanny has been through a lot she had a heart attack in 2020 but even after that she recovered well and was doing so well (we even threw her a welcome home party when she got out of hospital)
It all just Happened so sudden the night she passed I was in her house and she was talking away like normal then all of sudden she took a turn for the worst next thing I knew the ambulance was called and she just wanted to sleep , I’ll never forget having to say goodbye to my nanny over the phone but I knew I wasn’t strong enough to be there when she passed , my mum was there with her.
Now that the funeral has passed , I just feel empty like how can she be here then gone so fast , sometimes I think she is going to walk in the door , I don’t think I have accepted her death yet and I don’t know when I will , my heart is just shattered, the emptiness in my chest keeps me up all night , just don’t know how to deal with these feelings , I know I feel like this because I loved her to pieces and am grieving but I don’t know how to cope with daily tasks , does it get any easier?
Rose x
