Losing my nanny

Hi I lost my nan in 2023 due to her taking a very bad disease called Alzheimer’s disease were she forgot my name she didn’t know me and me or my family my nan fell and broke her hip then was taking into a care home then back to hospital were she died peacefully at half 4 on a Saturday morning I miss her everyday the pain is there and is not bearable I need to find help and someone to talk to