Aw bless you,theres no shame in crying-i’ve never been much of a crier but this past six weeks since i lost my love i’ve literally never stopped-especially at night times-thats always when i feel his loss the most,i’ve never been on my own in my life until now,I hate it&i don’t think i will ever get used to it-i don’t want to either.
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Aw bless you-i’m so sorry for your loss.I know what you mean,i found 2 letters from my love after he passed -both saying how amazing,strong &beautiful i am-i certainly don’t feel i am any of those anymore-he was the one who made me all of those things ,without him i am nothing.I’ve lost 4 kg in 6 weeks,barely eating or sleeping.My heart is broken &i will never get over his loss.He was&always will be the love of my life 
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Sorry for you loss , I lost my beautiful wife Jenny on the 28/7/23 I’m devastated and heartbroken wandering about in a daze. She died of ovarian cancer, I looked after her for nearly two years until the hospice took over, then she passed away quickly , can’t believe I will never see her agin, I’m in tears daily … hope it will improve soon and the pain will go away even a little is good…
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I know what you mean about walking around in a daze-i am the same,just feel so lost can’t concentrate or focus on anything the grief is just consuming me every moment of the day&night.My partner had bowel cancer for the last 7 yrs -hospital would treat it he’d get the all clear then it would come back again 7 times ,he had 2/3of his bowel removed but then it went to his his oesophagus-treatment was sporadic during covid & he was messed about alot,he had macmillan nurse out every other day to give him his immunotherapy injeections&pain relief.Ironically it wasn’t the cancer that took him-which is even harder to accept in a way if that makes sense?He always said the cancer would never beat him(stubborn ex-army mentality)-&he was right-it didn’t.
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My beautiful son died on the 17th July 2023 at 1.50 pm . He had cancer that went to the bones, then bone marrow . Not sure of primary, I got him to hospital with pains in hips and spine on the 25 th of April 2 023 , They said secondary bone cancer. He was born with disability, but he never let that stop him .
He normally phoned us in the morning ,that morning he did not. I phoned him he dropped the phone and I heard him say bloody hell. He then said his arm hurt bad ,I said we are coming. Normally the visiting hours were 2pm to 8pm I just knew thing were not right . We got there and managed to hold his hands, he said mum dad help me I scared . Then he seemed at peace and said I got to go now ,I said where he said death. My beautiful son he was 47 years old
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Oh my god thats so heartbreaking-i’m so sorry for your loss.Life is so very cruel&too many young,good people are getting taken way too soon.There are no words that anyone can say to ease your pain,just try to take comfort from the fact that he is now free from pain&at peace,i know thats not easy -believe me im still struggling to process the loss of my soulmate.Cherish every good memory&hang on to the love-that will never ever die.xx
Lost my wife yesterday to cancer. We were together for 30 years- married for 7. Still a bit in the disbelief stage. We did plan as the cancer was diagnosed 12 months ago, so we planned for the worst and hoped for the best. But that didn’t happen and the cancer took her. She was a fighter. She was 57, iam the same age.
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I am so incredibly sorry for your loss, I lost my soul mate 30th August. He had a brain hemorrhage and was recovering when he had a second bleed. I feel like I’m adrift at sea and I’m trying to get back to shore but when I’m so close, a wave pulls me away again.
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This must be so raw for you. I am so sorry you have joined us on this forum. It is my lifeline as I am housebound and alone most of the time. I hope you have lots of support around you at this vulnerable time. All I could do was howl like an animal at your stage. I live you analogy and so apt. Another post described it as a bag in a hurricane. Xx.
Sandra
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Aw bless your heart,so sorry for your loss.Be kind to yourself&just do whatever feels right-there are no rules when it comes to grieving;everyone deals with it differently x
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My tears roll and roll, i know its not the answer for you or me but i suppose if reflects the great extent of love we have for our partners and i hooe they feel our love now
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What a graphical description, I wish we could all find our way to wash up on a remote island somewhere, shelter from the waves and miraculously find that our love ones are there waiting for us.
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Just when i think i have no tears left they flow again uncontrollably.As the late Queen said"Grief is the price we pay for love".My Soulmates love is worth a million tears&more.I just hope he knows how much i truly love &adore him with every fibre of my being
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A beautiful thought
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Cancer does not care who it takes, but why does it take the good. I just listen to the news, and I think why does it not take someone like Putin . If it had happened to Hitler look how many lives might have been saved, no reason to it all.
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Oh that’s tough, mine went 5 weeks ago with cancer it’s a devastating disease. I’m still in tears daily if I’m in doors or out shopping it comes on at any time, I just let them flow, even before Jenny went we were driving along and tears were falling down my face because we new what was coming, she used to wipe away my tears . Im heartbroken People say be strong , that’s not easy…
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I see I am not the only one awake at this unholy hour. It’s nearly 3 months for me and I still cry every day. Just go with it and ignore people who say be strong. You are being strong just waking up each day. I think the advice is cry when you need to. It is part of the grief process and still very raw for you.
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I too understand what you are going through - my soulmate died one day after yours. It is overwhelming but I’m trying to take one day at a time. Don’t put any pressure on yourself.
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That is so apt, a bag in a hurricane. I have always been calm and controlled emotionally and I think that’s what I’m doing now. He was always so strong and had a temper (he was a redhead) where as I’m more analytical and methodical. I think be told he loves me on my last visit before the second bleed and having a massive hug and kiss has helped me stay level headed, we all got to tell him we love him and he was able to tell us the same. I’m taking comfort in him slipping away in his sleep
I too am a redhead but am also analytical so a bit of an anomaly. So glad you got a final hug. Something I missed.
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