Losing my wife

I lost my wife last month I finding it hard to come to terms with it I don’t think I ever get over it

6 Likes

Hi Chris

I’m so sorry that you’ve had to join this site. None of us want to be here but it does help to know that you are not alone.
Your loss is so recent that all I can say is keep ‘talking’ whenever you feel the need. It’s a great comfort to know that others feel the same as you. The only thing they can’t do is wave a magic wand and make everything alright and how it was……
Everyone grieves in their own way and time. I lost my husband, Ian, 16 weeks tomorrow and to be honest, I still haven’t come to terms with what happened.

Take care of yourself,

Julie x

2 Likes

I am so sorry that you find the need for this site. It is early days so just keep taking it a breath at a time, then eventually you will focus on a day at a time. My husband collapsed and died without warning - he was only 50. Life is so cruel and there is no easy way through this but keep posting and people will support you. Take care

Hi Chris
I am so sorry for your loss of your wife
It has been 3 years since my husband died out of the blue
I have to be honest you will never be the same but you learn to cope with the heartache
When your body is ready you will be able to start to live your new life as best as you can

I was off work for 5 months when my husband died I was in shock
The love of my life had gone after 25 wonderful years
I wished I had died instead of him but day to day week to week I did get stronger
I had so much to sort out when he passed that took away the grief for a while

I made myself go back to work
Started to have a new routine you need something to stop you thinking of your grief
It’s tiny wee steps at a time which is best for you
Remember to do what you feel you can do
There is no right and wrong
Use this site - share your feelings
We are all in the same boat here and you might find writing helps you cope
I wish you all the best
Sending my love

2 Likes

Hi Chris
I am so sorry for your loss.
I lost my wife 2 years ago when I was 55.
Everyone’s journey through grief is different.
Just don’t put any pressure on yourself to try to recover quickly.
I thought I was falling apart when my wife died.
The pain hit me every morning when I opened my eyes and I cried my heart out. As a man I felt so weak not being able to control my emotions but I gradually realised I never knew how anyone else deals with grief because we all grieve in private.
I told my wife before she died that if anything ever happened to her I thought I would fall apart. She said “you mustn’t do that - you only get one life to live and you can’t waste your time grieving for me - promise me that you will keep going - you have to.”
So I do.
I cry every morning and the pain I feel keeps me connected to her and reminds me I will always love and miss her.
Then it’s like I hear her cheeky little voice in my head saying" man-up". So I do. I get up and get on with my day. And every day I get through is one day closer to heaven.

So sorry to hear about this I lost my wife on December 1st last year.
Itdoes not matterwhat ever anyone says you never get ovef it
Nut you learn to live with the pain I still cry a lot when byself most is in the morning.
Most important thing is talk to someone a family member friend or a support group like this 0

Nor me Chris9,lost my wife to cancer last month ,still feels unreal,keep thinking it is all a dream and that she will come home again.Not coping with this at all.It is like being in a nightmare that never ends.Michael.

Hi I’m.so sorry too hear this… I lost.my husband on my birthday in Sept… I don’t know how too cope… people say it will get better but it won’t course his not here…
Don’t know how to be happy again I wanna laugh again but that’s not gonna happen…

1 Like

Hi its so sur real isn’t it? I lost my beloved chris on my birthday back in Sept… some mornings I can’t get up n the pain is immerse…
Night Times the worse for me I sit looking at the TV and I can hear his voice saying wanna a cuppa…
Christmas soon what the hell we gonna do?.
Where did yr wife have her treatment? We were based in addenbrookes tracy

1 Like

My wife was in Southend hospital for 7 weeks and then to hospice where she passed away 4 days later.I went to the hospital everyday to be with her ,feed her and help to nurse her,she had 3 drivers pumping pain killing drugs into her constantly.Gas and air as a night time stand by,it was heartbreaking to see and hear her in pain.She was let down by the Covid emergency,did not get a scan in time to spot the cancer until it was at stage 4.2 major operations,chemo and it still get her in the end.My world is shattered.Michael.

Omg I’m so sorry bloody covid. It’s heartbreaking isn’t it… I got my chris home and a week.later he passed… horrendous disease…
Hear if need chat…tract

1 Like

Thank you I will.Michael.

Hi Chris
I lost my wife two years ago after 39 years together to cancer ,I miss her every day
Everybody is different in coping with grief
So take every day by day
Good days and bad days

1 Like