Losing the most precious lady in my life my Nan. <3

I lost my nanny on the 15th of June this year sadly, her immune system and her body just gave up on her after fighting and staying strong for such a long time before I guess she wanted to give up a pointless battle and join my grandad up in the heavens, she would of been almost in her seventies.

It’s now December where Christmas is very fast approaching and spending it without her is indeed going to be a painful reminder that she is no longer here I guess the feeling of heartbroken is An understatement of the year.

When people tell me to remember her good memories and the good times of course it makes me comforted for a while but recently I have been even more depressed and noticed I spend a lot of one crying in my room instead of socialising with those around my age like my nan wanted to but I just cannot bring my self round to do this I’m finding it more difficult as time goes on I just wish I could hold her one last time and tell her how dearly she means to me.

Hi im sorry for your loss (im57 my wife was 41 she died on her birthday in March this year)Ido this ive taken all photos down and i live day by day .I cant re live the memories so i shut them down .The Nightmare regardless of what you do will still be there tomorrow,Give yourself some me time i.e watch a film go to the shop buy your favourite treat .Your brain needs a rest from this .Have you seen your Gp re medication to help (i take medication )i hope ive not upset you im sorry if i have .Friendship hug Colin (dont be a stranger keep coming back to this site )

Sorry for your loss Dominic.
I lost my Nan in Feb after a battle with cancer.
I don’t know your circumstances, but it sounds as though you were extraordinarily close to her, like I was to mine. If this is the case then I’m sure your Nan knew how much she meant to you.
For as long as I can recall Christmas was always spent with Nan.
It seems to be getting harder the closer it gets, this is our first Christmas without our respective Nan’s and although everyone is different, I am starting to think that it is only natural that our emotions will be sensitive to this and that we will be upset by the festive period and particularly the absence of the one special person it all gravitated around.
I too take comfort in memories and photos, but I know how you feel, as sadness soon overwhelms those feelings and I end up crying too.
I can’t tell you to go out and have fun, as I don’t feel like it in the most part, I can’t tell you time is a healer either, as I’m not far enough down the line in this journey.
I can tell you that going out with my friends every once in a while makes me feel semi-normal, if only for a couple of hours, as does just talking to them on the phone.
Have you reached out to anyone in your family about this?
Colin is right, you should see a GP or try CRUSE, I am going to do likewise, as reading other people’s threads it appears to help the process along. I keep making excuses not to, but I am doing it, my Nan wouldn’t have been happy with me feeling so down or avoiding life and from the sound of it yours wouldn’t have wanted this for you either.
With all best wishes