My son passed away 2 months ago after falling ill six weeks before. He was 57 a very fit man just started to feel unwell and was diagnosed with an advanced cancer.
I am struggling to come to terms with his death, I lost my sister and brother four years ago and then my husband of 54 years 3 years ago, but this grief is at another level.
I feel very alone with my grief, I feel so sorry for his wife and young adult children and his brother and sister and I don’t want to burden them with my grief as they are also grieving.
I just feel incredibly sad and am crying a lot, as soon as I open my eyes in the morning the feeling is there and stays with me every waking minute of the day it doesn’t matter what I’m doing it’s there all the time.
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Dear @Jean57
Thank you for bravely sharing your raw pain of your son’ s death with the community.
You will find there are plenty of other people on here who have similar experiences and who can provide support and advice for you.
It is obviously a very difficult time for you at present.
You may find the Grief Self Help Pack useful to look at for tips on how to manage at this difficult time.
Take care of yourself, keep talking, and be proud of yourself for getting through one day at a time.
Jolene1
Where do I find the grief self help pack?
@Jean57 my heart aches for you Jean so sorry for the loss of you son, doesn’t bear thinking about.
I lost my Mam 7 weeks ago and absolutely heartbroken I miss and love her so much.
Grief is the price we pay for loving somebody so much isn’t it.
Just take it hr by hr then day by day and always remember your lovely son would want you in the future , when your ready to live your life again. Take care
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Hi @Jean57
The Sue Ryder Grief Self-help Service is a new website that’s been developed to help you cope with grief through expert information, specialised advice and self-help tools, like journaling.
You can sign up here : https://selfhelp.sueryder.org
I hope you find it helpful 
Take care
Mick
Online Community team