Loss of Dad and brother

Hello. I lost my brother at the beginning of December, he was an alcoholic and we had a difficult relationship. I found him in pretty traumatic circumstances.
Then on Wednesday of this week my dad died. He’d been poorly for some time but it was still quite sudden in the end. I feel bereft, like my history and everything I’ve known all my life is disappearing. I have a wonderful husband and children but I just feel so utterly alone.

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Hello @KLM24,

I’m part of the Online Community team and I can see that you are new to the community - I’d like to thank you for bravely starting this thread and sharing how you are feeling. I’m so sorry to hear about your brother and dad. Most community members have sadly experienced the death of a loved one and so will understand some of what you are going through.

I’m sure someone will be along to offer their support, but I wanted to share a few Sue Ryder resources with you that might be helpful.

I really hope you find the community helpful and a good source of support and I also hope you feel you can access more support should you need it.

Thank you again for sharing – please keep reaching out and know that you are not alone.

Take care,


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Hi @KLM24 thank you for sharing what you’re going through. It so hard to explain what loosing a loved one feels like as I recently lost my dad last month and I was with him when he passed. I can’t begin to imagine what losing two loved ones feels like. I hope you have someone you can talk to and I will that you are surrounded in love and support to help you through this traumatic time. May your dad and brother memories live on through you.

My dad passed away last month from prostate cancer. I was with him at the hospital when he passed and I’m struggling to move forward too, I’m taking each day as it comes. He also had dementia and I was his carer for a while but found it extremely hard to cope with it. I took a little respite as he became verbally abusive but then he lost his mobility to his legs and was admitted to hospital. I immediately dropped everything and went to see him & I was with him everyday. He went for an MRI scan & passed away shortly after as his cancer had spread aggressively all over his body and it wasn’t able to handle the effects of the sedation they gave him. I don’t know how to feel as it all happened so suddenly and seeing him in his last moments was a very traumatic experience. I keep crying whenever I think of him , and I look around my house and see the little things he’s done like the shelves he put up or the little stool he brought for my son and it instantly sets me off. I isolate myself at times as I don’t know how to answer the how are you questions that come from friends & family as I honestly don’t know how I feel. I just know I need to slow down and properly process my emotions without judging them.

I understand how you feel . Lost my brother 30/12 then my mum 25/01.
26 days apart. Im struggling to cope and ive to go back to work next week which is making me anxious. Dont know what to do.