Loss of estranged Granny

I lost my Granny on 25th January. The last time I saw her was once in December, but before that was in 2003 when I was 8 years old. My Dad fell out with his Mam and my parents and she never reconciled. It was only by chance that my Uncle found my brother on social media and that is how we got back in contact. I only just found out from my step-granddad that she thought and talked about us all the time, wondering how we were doing. We live in Kent and London and my Granny lived in Durham. I always assumed she wouldn’t be thinking about us because we never heard from her. I am left with more sorrow and regret than I would have expected and am crying every day before and after work. I have even written her a letter today and she is the last thing I think of when I go to sleep and first thing I think of when I wake up. I am crying on the train to work and on the walk home. I never thought estranged grief could be so complicated

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