In July 2023, my husband passed away suddenly.
He was only 48 and we had only been together for 10 years. He was unwell but he wasn’t expected to die. He literally collapsed in front of me at home and despite the best efforts of the critical care paramedics they could not revive him. Its only been 7 weeks and only just over a week since the funeral. I think prior to funeral I was just in a state of shock and the funeral made me feel like I was losing him all over again and the pain seems so much worse now. I don’t recognise me or my life anymore and at this time I just cannot see a way how to deal with it all, don’t know what is expected of me and how I can try to move forward on a new life path that I don’t want. I just want our life back.
Big hugs and so sorry for what you are going through. People usually find that once the funeral is over, everything apparently ‘goes back to normal’, but for you, it’s just never going to be normal again. Just don’t be tough on yourself right now. Let out all your emotions. Is your husband buried? Can you visit his grave and talk to him? Or do you chat to him in your head, or out loud? I am sure he is listening and hearing everything, and guiding you on. I do believe they are around us, loving us unconditionally; and one day, no doubt, we will know what this life is all about. It is so very tough and you are in very early days. Just take it one day at a time. No doubt you can read lots more on here as we are all going through a similar journey. xx
Thank you. I think that a lot of people think that I was more prepared because he was unwell, but he wasn’t expected to die. The coroner has carried out post mortem and I have interim death certificate but the coroner is now carrying out further investigations which may take sometime. He is cremated but I am going to crematorium to decide upon his memorial this week so I know where he is and I have a place to visit. I talk to him in my head but am just finding it all very hard.
My husband died in June. I have the tele in all the time to counteract the quiet. I only turn it off when someone comes in which us not often,
Exactly as it should be. Anything that helps you sleep.