I lost my big brother who was battling MND in September and I’m struggling to cope with the loss mentally and emotionally. This cruel illness and destroyed my mental health. Watching him deteriorate slowly is the worst thing ive ever witnessed in my life. He was my best friend and struggling without him.
sending you loads and loads of love 
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Hello,
I’m so sorry for your loss and that you and your brother went through so much. Have you got a strong support around you? I recently lost my sister to cancer and the last few months of her life she suffered so much, seeing someone we love so much suffer and being so helpless to be able to help them is horrific and heartbreaking.
My sister was also my best friend, which recently I’ve tried so hard to be grateful for the amazing years I had with her as I know sibling relationships are all different but then I just can’t help but be so angry/sad that she was taken. It just feels so strange that someone who was always there since we were born, isn’t anymore. I don’t really understand if that acceptance will ever truly happen?
Sorry for the long message, I wanted to reach out to you as you had also mentioned your brother was your best friend