I lost my dad four months ago unexpectedly and I am still struggling to come to terms with it. He was only 67 and it was so sudden. I still can’t believe he has gone. I feel lost without him
Hi Redshaz73,
Welcome to the Sue Ryder Online Community. I’m so sorry to hear that you’ve lost your dad so suddenly. It sounds as though it was a huge shock.
I’m glad that you’ve found this site, as many of our users find that it helps a little to have somewhere to write openly about their feelings and get support from others who understand. While you wait for more replies to your post, you may also wish to read and reply to some posts by others in similar situations, for example:
Joanna30 lost her dad six weeks ago and started the conversation: Guilt
Louise74 and many other people posted in the conversation: Struggling over the loss of my mum
If there’s anything I can help with, or you have any questions about this site, just let me know.
Priscilla
Community Manager
Hi Redshaz73
Sorry to hear about the loss of your dad. Just wanted to let you know you are not alone however terrible you may feel. I lost my mum 6 months ago and I have also been lost without her. I do have some good days but also still struggle some days. Coming on here has helped me a lot because everyone understands how you feel.
I have read a few books that have helped me one is called Losing a parent by Fiona Marshall.
Take care, and look after yourself the best you can
Louise
Hi Louise
Thanks for your reply. I am sorry to hear about the loss of your mum. Lot of people seem to think I am ok but deep down I am not. I’ve felt I have only been able to talk to my husband and one of my friends as they both lost their dad and know what its like and what I am going through. Its only been four months and I am still finding it hard at times. I have some good days but like you I struggle some days and feel down. I have had people say it gets easier but I cannot see how it can.
I am hoping coming on here helps me.
Thank you for the suggestion of the book. Can I ask where you got it from?
Hi Redshaz73
Aww no problem I think it really helps coming on here as everyone really does know how you feel. I know everyone grieves in their own way and the relationship they had with the person that has passed away will be unique to them but we all have in common that we are very deeply missing someone we care about and have to find a way through that. I know people do say it gets easier and you have to take some comfort in that. Like you I think how can it possibly get easier, I don’t think it is a case of you not missing the person as much but you just learn to live and get on with life the best you can.
I got that book from amazon, I downloaded it to my kindle but I think it is also available as a book.
Take care and hope you are feeling the best you can.
Louise
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Hi
My dad passed away 6 week ago and at first I felt strong but now
I can’t even speak about him,with out becoming teary but never cry !
He was such an important part of my life ,we spoke everyday.
I nursed him in hospital and done all his care,but saw him fade everyday .
I feel totally lost without hearing his voice .
As long as I’m busy I can deal with it but the minute I stop…its there.
I’m doing overtime just to keep busy .