Hi I sadly lost my mam in January due to complications with medication. She spent a week in hospital and the last few days relying solely on a cpap to breathe. I was with her until the the end.
It was so traumatic, and this potentially could have been prevented, I feel upset and lost and it’s been 6 weeks. My mams interment is tomorrow and I feel like this will set me back even further. I’ve been off work ever since she passed away and just can’t imagine being able to cope going back at the moment, and worry that’ll I’ll need to go off again if I’m not 100% ready? Just wondering if I’m doing the right thing ?
1 Like
How sad that things turned out like they did, I feel for you. Personally I have always thought that being there at the end and holding their hand was such a privilege no matter the reason they have to leave us.
There is no right or wrong about returning to work, it’s when your brain can deal with the chang. Some find it hard and others find it helps them to re-adjust to the new life. Go with how you feel and how you are dealing with life without your mum. Mums are special and when they go a big part of us also goes. Don’t beat yourself up, be kind to yourself. S xx
1 Like
Thank you for replying. I do feel lucky to have had the opportunity to be there I know many don’t get the chance. I’m pleased I was there to reassure her and hold her hand until she left.
I miss her so much, part of me definitely went with her that day. I’m torn I don’t feel like I could cope with work but at the same time I’ve been off for quite a long time. I think from what you’ve said though I’m doing the right thing I’m clearly not ready yet.
I just can’t believe she’s not here anymore and I’m doing this, she was my best friend.
My mum passed last Friday and I was able to hold her hand and say goodbye along with my dad and husband. She died at home while the paramedics were trying to revive her. I can’t imagine getting over the trauma of it all.
I’m so sorry this happened to you as well, life is so unfair.
I’m contemplating getting back to work as I feel guilty for being away but it sounds like its the norm to be away for a while?
1 Like
I’m really sorry to hear about your mum. It’s so unfair isn’t it. It’s good that you were there for her as hard as it was, that’s all we can do, just be there. In relation to work it’s just how you feel. I’ve learnt that everyone is different. I’ve been off 6 weeks now and still can’t imagine going back yet. With your mum passing really recently, be sure to give yourself time.