9 weeks on since Christine passed away 
she passed after being diagnosed with a large aggressive brain tumour and sadly only lasted 8 weeks. My life is like a rollercoaster of emotions, I miss Christine so much it hurts, yes it’s early and all very raw but it doesn’t alter the fact that my life will never be the same it just can’t be. I’m sure I’m not alone in my situation and I sympathise with anyone going through this grief, I feel so alone even when I’m not alone if that makes sense. I have a fantastic network of family and friends but I haven’t got Christine x
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I’m sorry your wife died and had to go through that. You’re in those hard early days of raw pain and shock. The loss of your partner and your future together is just utterly devastating.
There are many here that understand how you feel and understand how hard this journey is for you.
You’re life will never be the same, it will be different. You’ve been thrown on a different path, one you didn’t want or understand. It will get easier and days will get lighter and the pain will dull and be less raw. You will continue to miss her but it won’t be all consuming.
Put one foot in front of the other and take it slowly, hour by hour, day by day and don’t look into the future, just live for now, for today as that’s all that’s guaranteed.
Take care
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Yep it totally does make sense to those of us who understand x
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Thank you for that 
Thank you
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My darling wife passed 18 July 23 to cancer, i miss her so much. Im sure we will meet again in heaven but o cant wait and i want her to come for me now.
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@John1066 Hi and a sad welcome to this site, so sorry to hear of the recent loss of your wife. You must be feeling utterly devastated and raw. Nothing really prepares you for the place we find ourselves in. I’m 9 months along now, at first I too felt that I just wanted to go, get off the ride, be with my wife. I’ve come to understand that I simply just didn’t want to be where my wife wasn’t. It takes time but these feelings do move away, they do linger but became less consuming. I’ve found coming on here and chatting with folk has had a very beneficial effect for me. Everyone on here is in the same situation to you, we all understand, we’ve been to the same dark places and we will help as we can. Hopefully you can keep reaching out. Take care of yourself, be patient with your situation, things will change, it will get easier to carry your grief.
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Thank you for your reply. I need to keep my wifes sprit close to me as time passes. I worry that as i have to get on with life and the pain fades that her bright star will fade too and i cant accept that to hapoen.
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@John1066 I felt like that too, I was terrified that I would forget her laugh, her smile, her voice, her touch. At the beginning all I could remember was all of the bad times, the months of her cancer, the arguments over the years, bitter words uttered in anger. It consumed me and I thought I had lost her for good. But she has come back, I can think of all the good times now and I can smile and feel her with me. It’s a long rough road, but it can be done. Things don’t really get better, they get easier to carry, the grief stays the same but life grows around it. She’ll always be with you, you will be able to let her in.
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Thank you so much
@John1066
I am so sorry to hear of the loss of your wife and sympathise that you now have to travel this horrendous road of grief.
I lost my husband seven months ago to cancer, and I feel his presence with me as I try to carry on with the life I have had thrust upon me. I speak to him a lot and in my head clearly hear his response. Each day I remember one of his little phrases I had almost forgotten, I remember his routines and picture him doing them. He is with me in so many ways, it’s very comforting.
I have photographs around and a special one as a screen saver on my iPad, so he’s there when I open it.
I remember everything about my wonderful husband and that’s never going to change, it will be the same for you about your dear wife. Love never dies.
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Thank you so much
Hi @John1066 so sorry for your loss, so heartbreaking and nothing we can say can heal that, but you’ve a good group of people on the site and myself included who share loss and heartache. The views posted are a constant help to me and hope they will be to you John 
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Thank you so much.
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@John1066 you’re welcome, just been for a lovely family and we all watched football together whilst my Grandson was in the play area. Back in the empty apartment on my own and that’s why I’m not drinking too much alcohol, it can have the wrong effect. I’ll go to bed now and hopefully sleep through then I’m not over thinking
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@Braztash56. I’m sure you are refreshed from your holiday.
I see your team is playing my local team on Sunday.
I hope you sleep well, agreed, not good to over-think.
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