Struggling so much right now. Christmas day will be 8 weeks since my fiancé passed, he was 46. Am dreading Christmas day wish I could skip this year. Picked his ashes up yesterday it just doesn’t seem real :broken_heart:


Hi Bex,
No. It doesn’t seem real. I can’t face Christmas without my mam. I made a memory tree with tags and an angel for the garden. I did online mass tonight with the lovely vicar who did the church service. Made me very upset and I had to stop singing. I’m still waiting to deliver my sister’s presents because her little one is still awake (it’s now 2.45 am). I can’t sleep anyway so it really doesn’t matter to me. I wish life could go back to normal. I’d be excited to spend the day with my parents, dressed up, bring the cakes, opening pressies and then with my sister and her family boxing day. Mam is everything to me. x



So sorry for your loss. It was 7 weeks for me. Although me and Gary had been together for 21 years , we only married on 16/10 before he passed 8/11. It was always a standard joke that we were only practicing and what was in a piece of paper. He actually said on our wedding night , “ we should have done this years ago”. I managed Christmas but spent most of the day on my own. I still can’t comprehend what has happened. All I can say is do what is best for you and not what people expect of you. Hope you managed yesterday.

Take care

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I am really struggling still doesn’t seem real, Christmas Day was so hard I he had bought me Christmas presents one of which was personalised, I have his ashes now but I can’t get used to the fact that’s him now just ashes


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Bed 9575

I have Gary’s ashes, they are at the side of my bed. Still doesn’t seem real. Every night I kiss his photo and rub the urn containing Gary’s ashes. He wanted them sprinkled, some out at sea as he loved fishing, some in Keswick where we have a caravan , it’s our favourite place. Unfortunately he will have to wait until it’s my turn to leave this world as I can’t bare to let them go and I want to be mixed with his.
Kiss you hand and place it on top of the ashes, some how I feel a weird sensation as thou there is some connection going on.

Take care

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I still haven’t heard about my mam’s ashes. She was cremated 17 December. I couldn’t celebrate Christmas at all. Did my memory tree and online memorial site but can’t add any more. Too upset. I’ve had to put her photo away because I can’t stop crying. It’s torture. I watched tv and cried. How does anyone get over this? It’s absolute torture.