Hi everyone. Just felt like sharing my feelings on here to see if anyone else feels or has felt the same.
I feel that I am mostly doing well after losing my beloved mum. I miss her so much.
I’m getting quite intense waves of grief. I think it’s maybe triggered with scattering some of her ashes a few weeks ago.
Also with Christmas just round the corner.
I feel like the reality that I’m not going to see her again is hitting harder as time goes on. Does anyone else feel like this?
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Hi @MiloReine7,
Thank you so much for sharing this with the community 
I’m sure someone will be along to offer their support, but I just wanted to let you know that you have been heard and you are not alone.
Take good care,
Alex
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I feel exactly like this. I lost my Mum 4 weeks ago. It hits hard when I remember again the reality of never seeing her again or having a chat. It’s the word never. As time goes on I feel it’s getting harder too.
I miss just being with her. She was my best friend. We loved going out for lunch and shopping together.
I lost my Dad 5½years ago and Mum and I were joined at the hip. She couldnt drive so I was always there. The only thing that consoles me is that they are now together again and I dont have to watch my Mum missing my Dad so much. With Christmas just around the corner Im just not feeling it, but as I have 2 children (late teens & early 20s) I feel I have to make the effort. I feel so lost, theres such a massive void in my life.¹
I totally undersfand how you feel.
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Hey both of you,
I feel exactly the same. My mum died end of May and I don’t really understand how my dad and I are nearly 7 months in. Time and grief are such a strange merge. It feels like this happened yesterday and yet I’ve been living this life for 6 whole months. I don’t understand how.
Christmas would’ve been hard anyway with it being the first one but I feel it’s going to be extra sad because even at 27, my mum always made it special and magical. I love my dad of course, but we don’t have the same bond that my mum and I did. As I’d gotten older; she really was my best friend and I’ve lost such a core part of who I am that it’s tragic to have to just carry on without that. I’ve lost a massive part of who I am and I don’t really understand who I am now. I have glimpses of when the old Katie is back but she’ll never truly be here again as she had her mum.
People keep asking me what I want for Christmas and all I want is my mum. We recently did my mum a Christmas tree at her grave side. Put lots of gold decorations on it (her favourite) with warm white lights and it looks really beautiful. I’m glad we’ve done that for her. It feels sad to be making ‘new traditions’ but at the same time you’re allowed to do things that make you feel any glimpse of joy or just make you smile as grief is already sad enough.
I feel it worsens over time, the ache is deeper and the trauma of it all seeps into your bones. This is one of those situations people don’t understand until it happens to them and this is honestly the worst experience of my entire life and the fact I have to have this for the rest of my life, that’s true heartbreak 
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Ah KatieLou, I feel your pain and the ache you’re feeling deep inside. It physically hurts so much. I feel I’m just existing. Life will never be the same again. I keep thinking inside my head, it’s ok Mum you can come back now, youve been away long enough. When I think of this new reality, I panic, and try to change the course of things in my head.
I have a little memorial flowerbed for my Dad in my garden. Today I saw a little robin on the magnolia bush flitting around on the branches. We used to sit and watch the robin together and talk about how it seemed to appear when we were talking or laughing about Dad.
My Mum was my world, my life, my all, I’ll miss her for eternity. Sending hugs KatieLou, you’ve a lot to bear on young shoulders. Be gentle on yourself and talk about your Mum at every opportunity. The memories you have of your time together wiil be a comfort in the days ahead.
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Hi thanks for your messages. I’m feeling in a different place again since I wrote this post. It just shows you how the grieving process is so up and down. Sometimes when you are having a bad day/moment it feels so hard to carry on.
Think the thing is with the massive void in our lives that we still have to carry on and life has changed so so much.
I miss my mum so much. Just being around her and doing stuff with her. We would do the Christmas food shop together it’s the simple things that you miss.
It’s my son’s birthday on Christmas Day so as always we will have a good time and remember my mum will fond memories 
X
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