I do understand, Lynne x x
I also keep a journal and a bevearment journal where l just write down stuff that catches me uexpectedlyâŚthoughts and emotions that happen when lâm by myself and unable to tallk to anyone whichis most daysâŚmy older brother is supportive but heâs quite practical and lâm emotional so where l could talk to mum l find it difficult to talk to himâŚso most nights l find it hits and l end up talking privately to mum and it is mostly little things which you wouldnât expect to upset you - like coming acrosss mums toothbrushes or just the ongoing emptiness from not having her here with meâŚand l keep asking and telling mum things so sheâll know lâm tryingâŚReading what other people have said/replied has been helpful and in different areas which l didnât expect, just wanted to say thank you for being there and allowing me to talkâŚbefore l was struggling to remember anything now memories/feelings are coming back - l look at photos and can remember sounds and what the weather was like and it stirs another memory of that time and something we didâŚMum is warm, caring and always supportive and very house proud and just loved Elvis and family and dogs and we did everything (apart from me going to work) together so the void is huge and the pain is greater because the thought of doing anything without her just hurts so much l canâtâŚ
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Hi everyone, havenât been on in a while but just wanted to say Iâm doing better, Mumâs always with me, guideing me. Went for a walk around local park, sun was out, as were families being the holidays but still was okay. Have a day trip planned and thatâs starting to look like it will happen, l have this thing Iâve been doing where l try to plan something then talk myself out if it but this time feels differentâŚl feel different, still miss and talk to Mum daily but l seem to be coping.
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