Lost my best friend to suicide

My best friend ended her life 3 days ago.
She was the kindest, most gentle soul I had ever met. I’ve never felt quite so connected to anyone else. She made my days brighter just by being there and I am feeling completely lost without her.
I keep reading through our messages and the pile of silly little notes she used to leave around the house if she left for work before I woke up.
I sent her a message yesterday, I don’t know why, I just want to speak to her. And this may seem so stupid but it’s breaking me that the ‘sent’ will never turn to ‘seen’.
I see her everywhere and in everything. I’m not sure how to cope with the fact that I’ll miss her everyday for the rest of my life.


Hi @Alicx
I so sorry to hear of the sad loss of your friend. It’s not silly to still message her phone, it’s understandable you miss her, & wish you could speak to her, this is your grief journey, you do what you feel is right for you, some people speak to a photo of their loved one, some people keep a diary, some people write a letter to them, as my mom died at home, in our sitting room, I have actually started saying hi to her when I walk in that room sometimes, this is your grief journey, just take it a day at a time & do what works for you.