Lost my best friend who was my ex boyfriend x

Hi , I just lost my ex partner , he was my best friend really , it was very sudden , I’m still in shock tbh , it was four weeks ago , everyday I used to speak to him and we always had this jokes that we shared , nobody was like him , he was very kind and thoughtful and annoying in a silly way aand bonkers and funny and loving, I felt very numb and I’m still in disbelief , I just can’t understand it and the fact that he was here one minute and gone the next , friends all helped in the beginning then they disappear , a common theme , some people who I have supported in their lives hardly bothered , that just makes me feel sad . Im starting now to feel the loneliness and the sorrow , it’s not much fun , feel a bit frighted that I will get depressed or get anxiety , some people say things to be helpful but my mind keeps thinking why are they saying these things to me , still in the shock , I don’t have that many people I can reach out to , some people feel draining , when he died I thought of suicide but that’s not really an option , anyway I send love to everyone who is in this pain as it’s just the most terrible feeling x

@Charlottelett hi I am so very sorry for your loss this journey of grief is so hard to navigate so many feelings and thoughts that come to the surface and knock us back everyday take one day at a time and take it easy on yourself and keep posting on here you will find support we all try to help eachother as best as we can I’m often around if you ever want to chat take care sending hugs x

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@Charlottelett
Hello ,
I’m really sorry for your loss . It is the most terrible thing to lose someone who you love dearly and has been such a big part of your life . I am three and a half months into my grief journey and life is still a struggle without my mum who was also my best friend . Like Casey said just take it a day at a time . Even when I have had a really tough day I get into bed proud of myself that I have coped . Take care of yourself and I am here if you need to talk.
Love Angie x

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Hi. So sorry you find yourself here. I lost my husband 19 weeks ago but I also lost my best friend to a brain tumour in 2018 so I can relate to how you’re feeling right now. Please don’t do anything rash or try to hurt yourself - reach out on here, there’s always someone who will talk with you and help you through it. You feel so alone as friends concern tails off. It’s hurtful I know but as others say - they won’t get it till it’s their turn. Not that we wish this kind of pain on anyone. Everyone here gets it, so you can say what you think,feel etc with no judgement and I’ve found there’s always at least one but more often a few who are feeling exactly the same. Sometimes it’s just comforting knowing others feel like you do. Take care x

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Thank u x I send u hugs x

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Thank u very much , I send u love x

Hi @Charlottelett,

Welcome to the community (although I know it is because of sad circumstances) and thank you for sharing some of your story here.

I was sorry to read about your best friend and ex partner and that you thought about suicide when he died. I am glad to read you feel that is not an option but I just wanted to reach out to you to let you know you do not need to struggle alone - if, at any point, you are feeling overwhelmed or those thoughts continue or increase, please can I encourage you to reach out and talk to someone about how you are feeling.

Samaritans are available 24/7 to talk about anything that you are worried about in confidence. You can call them on 116 123 or email jo@samaritans if you find it easier to write things down.
Shout are also contactable 24/7 but by text stead - all you need to do is text SHOUT to 85258 and talk to them about anything.

Sue Ryder also offers a free online bereavement counselling service - if you feel some one-to-one support might be helpful, please find out more here: www.sueryder.org/counselling.

Thank you again for bravely starting this thread. Keep on reaching out - I do hope you find the community helpful and a good source of support.

Take care,
Megan

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Thank u can u let me know how I delete posts please x