It’s been almost two months since my cat was hit by a car and killed. I will never forget my Mother knocking on my door in a panic and saying “Moon died”. I just remember my heart dropping. I didn’t want to believe it.
I ran upstairs to find my sweet boy inside a cardboard box. He looked like he was just sleeping. I sat right next to the box crying and asking “why?” And asking him to just please wake up.
I was in total shock and disbelief. I didn’t want to believe it was real. I just sat there crying and petting him.
I ended up buying him in the front yard under a tree and saying my goodbyes. I had no idea what was in store for me. This is the first loss I have had to deal with in some years and Moon was my best friend. I got him with a girlfriend at the time and when we ended up splitting up i kept him.
He was so sweet and amazing. He helped me through one of the worst times in my life. He was there for me when nobody else was and now that he’s gone I feel like I’ve lost a part of me.
I’m not doing well. I thought I was in the beginning but things are just slowly getting worse over time. I’m exhausted all the time. I switch back and forth from a good mood to a bad one and even when I’m in a “good” mood I always feel it in the background lingering. I’m just existing at this point.
I want to take time off from work to give myself a little break but feel like they won’t understand because it’s a cat, so I torture myself even more by not even trying to call out because I’m scared of being judged so it becomes this horrible cycle of just wanting to run away from everything but I know I can’t.
Idk, I’m just lost and devastated at the moment and just wanted to get this out.
Pets are family members too and the pain when they leave us can be devastating. Not everyone understands that, though, I know this from my own experience. Like Burgled said, you might not have to give the reason to your workplace if you are worried about their reactions. Sending hugs. 
