Lost my dad and really struggling.

My dad passed away just over a month ago and i feel worse every day. He was only 62 years old, he passed away six days after he got a cancer diagnosis, its all so hard to process. My mum was with him since they were teenagers and i feel so heartbroken for her, she puts on a front but i know she must feel so sad and lonely and i wish i could take her pain away and make things better for her but i know i cant. I am in my late 20s and i am pregnant, my baby is due in January. I feel so sad that my dad wont be here to meet his grandchild as he was so excited about it - we never thought for a minute he wouldn’t be here. My husband is trying his best to be supportive but i know its hard for him to find the right words. I just feel like none of my friends can relate as none of them have lost a parent, my best friend still has all four her grandparents around. Other friends compare the loss to them losing a grandparent, because that’s all they can relate to - i dont want to compare looses as everyone greifs differently but i have lost all of my grandparents but nothing compares to how i feel after loosing my dad. Just feel so lost and broken. Dont know how to get through this.

My dad died a month ago and it’s nothing like losing a grandparent especially as my dad died suddenly like yours it’s like my universe has shifted an nothing will be the same again be kind to your self ok and from my experience people don’t know what to say unless they have lost a parent themselves

I lost my Dad & eldest brother as a result of a house fire in April… such a shock & I feel totally devastated. I was so close to my Dad… we spoke most days & always laughed such a lot about silly things… we had the same sense of humour. He was my best friend too… and I can’t put into words how much I miss him. It’s like my world has stopped going round & everyone else’s is still carrying on… and obviously I understand that. Of course no one knows how you feel… they can’t unless they’ve been through what you’re going through… it’s a journey without an end. I don’t think my friends can relate to it at all & find it difficult to know what to say. Many times I don’t want them to say anything about it because I find it hard to have that conversation without being in floods of tears. You will have moments… maybe days when you think you’re feeling a bit better & more positive… but I’ve found I easily slip back. I cling on to the hope that my better moments get more frequent & longer as time passes by. Take care dcb 123 & Meadows… my thoughts are with you…I know exactly what you’re going through. xx

Hi dcb123,

Know where you are coming from…
I’m sorry that you are going through this. It’s not like loosing a grandparent. I had a friend who kept comparing my dad’s passing in April to her beloved pet dog- go figure!!! Needless to say I don’t speak to the muppet anymore.

I understand that your dad will not be there when your little ones is born but he might be in spirit depending on what you believe. I know it doesn’t make up for anything, you want your dad here to share in the joy and simply talk to, I get it. I keep seeing things changing in my area and often what to tell dad about it. I never know what to do with these thought so I made a journal and hope somehow he can read/share it from above.

Keep posting on this site, take it hour by hour. It’s recent and I’ll tell you what everyone told me (mind you I couldn’t do it) but be kind to yourself.

Take care and there is lot’s of support here.