Lost my dad

My dad passed away after being ill for a week with what he said was food poisoning.
His partner had been try to get him to see a doctor but he refused. So she asked me to come over and try and talk him into getting a doctor.
So i went over and he was really angry that i was there. He didn’t want me to see him. So i sat with his partner for a bit. I could hear dad trying to get to the bathroom. He was struggling. He never made it to the toilet in time and asked his partner to come up and clean up the mess.
She went up and cleaned up and came back down im tears. So i decided that we really needed to get him an ambulance. He wasn’t eating, hardly drinking, was messing himself and couldn’t get out of bed.
I didn’t want to do it all behind his back so i went and said to him that we were getting him some help. He went mad. He accused me of all sorts. Anyway we phoned for the ambulance. They can and checked him over and advised that he go to hospital. But dad refused and sent them on there way. They couldn’t force him to go so there advice was to phone the doctors in the morning and try and get dad to agree to getting blood tests done.
I went back up and apologised to dad for getting the ambulance out. I had a brief conversation with him and gave him a hug and a kiss and said i would see him soon.
Next morning his partner phoned me asking if i could go over because dad was in abit of a mess and she needed help.
So i headed over but by the time i got there he had died. The paramedics were still there trying to revive him.
But he was gone and they couldn’t do anything. Next thing the police arrived and took statements from myself and his partner. Then the doctor came and was unable to confirm cause of death.Then the undertakers came and took him away.
A post mortem had to be done because he died at home, hadn’t seen a doctor for 3 yrs and the doctor couldn’t confirm cause of death.
After a week his body was released and we could go ahead with his funeral.
Still dont know what dad died from, it could take months to get the post mortem results but i think he knew that it was more than food poisoning and just didn’t want all the fuss.


Hi @Casper23,

I’m part of the Online Community team and I can see that you are new to the community - I’d like to thank you for bravely starting this thread and sharing how you are feeling.

I’m so sorry to hear about your dad. Thank you for sharing your experience. Most community members have sadly experienced the death of a loved one and so will understand some of what you are going through.

I’m sure someone will be along to offer their support, but I wanted to share a few Sue Ryder resources with you that might be helpful.

I really hope you find the community helpful and a good source of support and I also hope you feel you can access more support should you need it.

Thank you again for sharing – please keep reaching out and know that you are not alone :blue_heart:

Take care,
Online Community Team

That’s really sad and sounds traumatic , I hope you get some answers as to what happened . It’s such a tough time without that x

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