I lost my mom in December of 2024 it’s now been over a yeah with her gone and there’s so much conflicting emotion she’d not treated me, my sister, my brother and my dad nicely for a while but unfortunately she was an addict and had a lot of mental health issues which she took out on us. When she died i hadn’t seen her since April of that year she left us all for one of her exes and lied about everything for months and then in December she tried to come back like nothing happened but when it didn’t go how she thought she overdosed and passed away as I said I’ve got a lot of complicated emotions because the main thing is I miss my mom so much but at the same time I’m so angry she promised she would never leave us and she did it twice the second time forever. I’ll always be angry about that I think but I spend most nights laying in bed just wanting to message her or call her and talk things out tell her how my own child is doing I want her in my kids life but she’s gone and that can’t happen I miss her so much I miss laughing with her at silly movies I miss her horrendous and hilarious singing I just miss her and wish I could have helped her even though she left us I still would’ve liked to work on fixing our relationship or at least getting to a happy medium which is what i thought was happening all I’ve got left is her ashes, the last messages and the memories. Wherever she is now I hope she’s finally found the peace she deserved and I hope she knows I still love her. I really miss my mom.
Hello @NMadden,
I can see that you’re new to the community. I hope you find it to be a support to you, but I am so sorry for the loss of your mom that brings you here.
Losing someone to suicide can bring a lot of intense and conflicting feelings. I wanted to share some sources of support that might help you right now.
- Survivors of Bereavement by Suicide offer support to people over 18 who have been affected by suicide. They have a supportline on 0300 111 5065 and run support groups nationally.
- Support after Suicide has a list of local and national support.
You might also want to explore our Online Bereavement Support, where you find our Grief Guide self-help platform, and where to find our Grief Kind Spaces.
Thank you again for sharing – please keep reaching out and know that you are not alone.
Take care,
Seaneen
Hi @NMadden
I’m so sorry. It sounds like you have had a really awful time. I haven’t any words of wisdom, only to say keep posting here as we may all have different experiences but people understand how it feels to lose someone you love. Just wanted to let you know you that you have been heard and people here care. Take care of yourself as best as you can 