Lost my beautiful grandma October 17 202 to Parkinson’s. Am absolutely devastated. The immense loneliness and pain I’m currently experience. I’m unable to eat or sleep. My moods have gone from anger to sadness to mania and it’s just a horrible rollercoaster of overwhelming grief since then. My family live in France and my grandma lived in london. I don’t have a good relationship with my own mum so my grandma was really my mum. My safe place, she would never judge me and she showed me what the meaning of love was. I have to show up for work and I use work as a distraction so during the day my mind is occupied and the second I am alone, I am just back to grieving. The sadness and the crying come from nowhere sometimes and it’s unbearable to suppress. Many of my friends now are married or have left the UK so I don’t have friends left here now: moving outside of london didn’t help either. I’m so alone and I feel like the lost not only my grandma but the love I fear I will never have again.
I’m so sorry for the loss of your grandma, @KarenWalker - I can hear the devastation in your post.
I wanted to share this with you in case it’s helpful to know that what you’re feeling right now is normal, and you’re not alone:
But if it does feel too much and if you need some extra support, please do think about making an appointment with your GP. Grief is hard and you don’t have to do it alone.
Take good care and keep reaching out,
Seaneen