Lost my mom and her family blames us

Hi, I recently lost my mother to cancer. It was her third time and was stage iv. Her options were palliative care with hospice or chemotherapy. She chose not to have chemotherapy, and her family (3 sisters, 1 brother and 100 year old mother) could not accept her decision. So they called her day and night bullying her into doing chemotherapy.
Her wish was to be at home and as comfortable as she could be with her children.
Her family and my brother tried all sorts of ways to push her into a hospital including starting legal proceedings to gain guardianship, accusing her primary care give (my sibling) of elder abuse and sending vitriolic emails blaming us for not making better decisions.
My mother lasted 7 weeks from her diagnosis. Not a single one of them came to see her, came to the funeral or even the memorial. They sent us documents outlining our shortcomings and blamed us for her death.
Now they’re contesting the will and requesting medical records to do I don’t know what.
I don’t understand why they hate us so much? We have lost both of our parents to cancer and are trying to grieve.
Has anyone else experienced this with family?
Thank you for reading this

Hi jugima
That is awful for you at a time like this but it seems not uncommon. I was mums 24/7 sole carer and havent seen my 3 siblings not even a call to ask if im ok. It must be very hurtful for you. In sure there will be someone on here who can helo you more (they are very kind) but just sending you hugs and love for nowx

Thank you for your message. That’s amazing that you were your mother’s sole carer. I’m so sorry about your siblings. My brother was my mom’s primary care giver, and I oftentimes felt like he needed more of my support than my mom did.

Just to let you know there are other threads on here and you may find one to help with your problems. Meanwhile take care of yourself. Hugs pam2

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