Lost my mum at 22

My mum was my everything. I lost her when I was finally at the age where we really start to have fun and be girls together.

I finished uni and came home to help look after her care during chemo and other treatments. I feel we were never really told how bad it was, only that things were stable enough. So life kept moving forward, a year and a half in Mum and I decided that I should solo travel for the first time. She helped me plan and pack and I called her every single day when I was away.

The morning before I was scheduled to come home my dad called me to tell me she had died. I was on the other side of the world and I had to travel over 24 hours alone to get back to a home I could no longer recognise.
As the only girl in my family now I felt such a weight to carry everything and everyone around me whilst figuring out own my life now.

I know no one around that has experienced this at my age and I struggle to manage my anxieties for the future and socialise normally. My dad has had to rely on my support a lot and I am grateful for him too but I feel reminded that his original life has gone whilst mine still has a chance at happiness. But everyday I still need her. And that will never change


Im so sorry for the loss of your mam, my mam was my best friend when she died just after my 30th, on mothers day :joy:, i can only laugh about the irony.
Similarly my situation was over a rapid time frame, in an unpredictable situation. I beat myself up for not noticing the seriousness as im a nurse and just couldn’t see the evidence in front of me at the time.
I equally and thankfully dont have anyone else to connect over this tricky navigation system without some decent guidance from anyone with some wise words. Ive lost my self along the way and hoping to find that again soon.
My life has been frequnted often by my new friend anxiety although im hoping they get a new hobby soon and sod off :sweat_smile:. Thanks for reading.