Lost my Mum

Mum died suddenly 2 weeks ago in hospital, not coping well at the moment, feel so alone and very emotional. The funeral is on Tuesday and it is her birthday on Wednesday. I have a feeling of dread every time I think about it. Booked a 2 night Warner holiday as a treat for her birthday but will now be going alone, not sure if that is a mistake.

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I can’t even try to imagine what you’re going through. Only you can decide whether or not to still go away for the weekend. Is there someone who could go with you? If it was me I don’t think I could go alone but we’re all different. Just remember that you’re in shock. Two weeks is no time at all to process such a dramatic loss. Sending you the best of wishes in such a sad and difficult time x

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Sending love and wishes. I lost my mum 10 weeks ago and my dad just 9 days ago. Your feelings are valid and it will take time for things to settle. I cry everyday and there are so many triggers.

I dreaded mums funeral but it was a beautiful day in the end. So many memories shared and it was lovely hearing all the stories and hearing all the love. The days after are harder and the chaos settles - do take care of yourself and try to remeber the good times. Rob x

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I am sorry for your loss.
I lost my mum 5 days ago. It hasn’t sank in yet. I spoke to her on 19th December, she said her blood pressure was low, she was going to see her doctor about changing her medication. On the 20th December I got a call from my aunt that mum is on ICU. I was on the plane next day. That was 7 weeks ago. Every day I visited her in hospital (not local to me so journey was 2 hours each way), she never gained back her conciousness, I was told her brain died and even if she lived she would be on life support forvever and she wouldn’t know who I was. I hope she could hear me but I don’t know. I was never able to make contact with her. She died 5 days ago and I felt relief as couldn’t do it anymore. I was exhaused physically and emotionally. Worst 7 weeks in my life. And now I’m left with massive guilt, I keep thinking I should have done something. Should have visited more often, should have been kinder, shouldn’t have argued. I don’t know if I will be ever able to forgive myself.

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@Ola13

I’m so sorry about your dear mum. This sounds traumatising.

Guilt is a normal part of grief. All the ‘what if’s’ and blaming yourself. It’s raw for right now and your head will be spinning. You did your best and it’s not your fault. Your brain just needs to get your head around it.

The hospice nurse said hearing is the very last sense to go. And studies with patients in a coma have shown this. Your mum heard your words of love.

Thinking of you and sending a virtual hug. Roberta x

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