Hi,
I’ve just joined so it’s my first post…I may ramble on a bit but just need to get my feelings out…
I lost my mum 2wks ago Friday to dementia…
The 1st wk wasn’t too bad as was busy helping care for my dad but I live 5hrs drive away so now I’m back home it’s hitting me…
Having lived away from the family home for a long time I’m used to not seeing it speaking to my mum all the time but I can’t believe she’s not going to be there when I visit… it’s like it’s not real
I’ve no interest or energy to do anything…
the crying & emotional times I understand but I feel so exhausted & just want to be alone…
I’ve tried going out with the dog to quiet places as can’t do with general public atm, but tbh I’m struggling to find motivation to do this…
I tried going back to wrk last wk but after 2 days broke down in the morning so taking a few more days off …
I feel like I should be pushing myself to get back in to my normal routine but to be honest I just don’t want to… 
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Im so sorry, it just is so hard isn’t it. I lost my mum 4 months ago now. There are good days and bad days and I don’t think there is anything except to just get through them in hope of eventually reaching brighter times. When I first went back to work I was keen to get out of the house (mum lived with us) byt when I was out, I was desperate to get home. I do hope you start to feel stronger. It is a long haul though xx
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Hi @Shadow073
I’m so sorry for your loss but just wanted to let you know everything you’re going through is absolutely normal. Grief is a journey of learning to live with it, not getting over it. It takes much longer than you ever thought and you don’t realise you are making progress because you can be dragged down the black hole ar any time. Perhaps try starting a journal, it helps get the grief out good to look back on to see any progress.
I’m coming up to six months and to be honest not in the best of places as we’ve just started clearing mam’s house, its triggered all the sadness.
One thing though is I find you get used to the triggers and get over them quicker.
I wish you well on your awful journey🫂
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A good way of describing grief
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After my mum died in January this year I ended up taking 5 weeks off work as the week before she passed my dad couldn’t look after her alone but when my sister passed I only had a few days off work went back did less than an hour before I went home for about 2 weeks but really struggled working for nearly 2 years now Im struggling again at work and been nearly 7 months since I lost her so don’t rush back to work take as long as you need I’m sure your managers are understanding I got a sick note from doctors for 3 weeks hope it helps and you are not alone
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