Lost my son and partner a month apart...

I need people with similar heartache to talk to. Most of the tone I am feeling overwhelmed…

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Hi Emmergy I’m very for your losses i lost my partner just over 3 weeks ago so I can understand how painfull it is I don’t have any children just try to take one day at a time I’m sorry I have no real words of wisdom but it does help talking on here everyone understands what you are going through hang in there and take care

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Emmergy I’m sorry for your losses you are welcome to message me anytime you need to chat

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Hello Emmergy.

I’m so sorry to hear about the loss of both your Husband and Son . It sounds as though things are very tough at the moment and you are feeling overwhelmed.

I’m glad that you’ve been able to share how you are feeling here, and I hope that you find the community a good source of support. Everyone here has experienced the loss of a loved one and will understand some of what you are going through.

Sue Ryder offers an online bereavement counselling service. This is a free service and sessions are held via video chat so you can attend from home. There’s more information about this service here: www.sueryder.org/counselling

Another good place to get support is Cruse Bereavement. They offer a helpline, email support, and counselling and support groups through their local services: 0808 808 1677, helpline@cruse.org.uk, http://www.cruse.org.uk/bereavement-services.

You may also find Survivors of Bereavement by Suicide - http://uk-sobs.org.uk/ 0300 111 5065, helpful.

Things are very raw and distressing for you at the moment, so please continue to post on here. Our other members are amidst their own grief, but will offer support and comfort to you.

Take care,
Audrey,
Online Community Team

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I am so sorry for your losses. Your grief will be overwhelming at the moment. There are people here who understand. I lost my 50 year old husband suddenly and unexpectedly and we are still awaiting news from the coroner as to why it happened. I know the trauma of a sudden death. Have a look at the website refugeingrief.com The writer lost her partner suddenly and understands the grief. She has written a book as well - I’m reading through it. There is also Cruse and Sue Ryder counselling that may help. Also, talk to your GP, mine has been very supportive. Sending hugs

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Thank you for you support, I will keep in touch and let you know how I am coping…

It’s the days are worse, even though it is difficult to sleep. I have waking nightmares off him laying vertically asking the railway track waiting for the train to come. His death certificate status crushed skull and body. It is horrible. The images in my head are as off the wall,…

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Hi Emmergy,
So sorry, I have only just seen your post and I am so sorry about the dreadful shock you have had.
Having lost a relative in a similar way, (he stepped out in front of a train), I can understand how you feel. I am wondering if it the worst thing for remaining family to cope with, because apart from the loss, obviously guilt will come into it. Could I have done more? Why didn’t I notice he was suffering, etc etc. Also anger, how could he have done this to a family who loved him? It’s a living nightmare, but one we have to learn to live with.
This may sound heartless, but over the years since it happened, I have realised that he wanted to leave this world, so he got what he wanted. We who are left behind should not have to have their lives ruined by his actions. That is not fair. So I have learned to miss him but be relieved that he is where he wanted to be. And so I am getting on with my life. I will never forget him, but will keep him safely in a little place in my heart.
I realise that this may be different and much harder for parents of a child who committed suicide or people who have lost partners. My relative was none of those, so it might have been a little easier for me. My thoughts are with you. X

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I’m so so sorry for your horrendous losses it’s utterly devastating in my thoughts take care stay safe :broken_heart::cry:

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Thank you. My partner’s funeral was today. Now I am at home all alone and missing them both so so much

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Omg im So so so sorry it’s soul destroying there’s no words to describe this pain and suffering anguish and turmoil in my thoughts take care stay safe :broken_heart::broken_heart:

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I know there is nothing that can be said to ease your pain but I am thinking of you. I know what it is like to loose a partner but you have had even more to deal with, I have found refugeingrief.com very useful - written by someone who understands.

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Thankyou so so much for your kind words means alot in my thoughts take care stay safe x :broken_heart: :cry:

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@Emmergy I can’t imagine how you feel at the loss of two loved ones so close together. Please contact your GP if you haven’t already done so to see if they can put any help in place for you. My partner died suddenly and unexpectedly towards the end of 2020. I still cannot understand why. I assume that your partner was so overwhelmed that he couldn’t see any other way out. I have no experience of anyone that has committed suicide, apart from a friend’s mum years ago, but from what I can gather they just want whatever is torturing them to stop. Unfortunately that has left you to pick up the pieces when you were already devastated by the death of your son. Please put your thoughts and feelings on here. It helps to write things out rather than keeping them locked inside. I hope you have some other family or friends nearby for support. You will find support on here. Sending you hugs and special wishes.

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So sorry for both your losses i cannot even begin imagine what you are going through right now to lose 1 is bad enougu but to lose your partner and son so close heartbreaking
I hope you have support from family and friends aswell as on here xx

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