On 21st December I lost my best friend, soul mate, love of my life. - he was 43. It was completely unexpected, no symptoms, he had been perfectly fine during the day & days leading up to it. The experience was extremely traumatic, I had to do chest compressions for 20 mins waiting for the ambulance. Our 10 year old daughter was outside at 4am to flag down the ambulance. They tried to save him for 45 mins, but he died at home on our landing. I held his hand while he passed.
I don’t know how to do life without him. He was my everything. I’m terrified of being a single mum.
I have a great support network, but no one really understands what we are going through.
Good morning Kelmitch79, I’m really sorry you’ve had to join this group as noone would want to but I hope you find some comfort being able to chat to people who are going through the same sort of heartbreak as you. Having young children is a blessing but Al’s and added worry as you’ll be worrying about their bereavement as well as your own. Especially as the two often conflict. I’m glad to hear that you have at least people supporting you.
My loved one died four days after your husband although she had been with cancer for two years and though in some ways we knew it would happen when it did it was like being ripped apart, just writing this brings on the tears.
I really hope you find some solace here.
Wishing you all the strength you need
Tom
Hi Kelmitch79 so very sorry and as Tom says above this is a group no-one ever wanted to be part of. But it is a really supportive safe space to share your feelings and all the horridness of what we are going through. It sounds very traumatic and bless your 10 year old for having to flag down the ambulance. I also tried to revive my partner as he had called me from work sounding awful but really had died by the time I got home which was only 15 mins or so later, just before the ambulance. I felt very traumatised early on by that experience as it was so sudden and unexpected (DVT and pulmonary embolism after an accident that he was in quite a lot of recovery from). I found treating it in my head as PTSD where talking about the experience really helped and two months on it is fading a lot.
We understand what you are going through and my patience through this has definitely been depleted. IMHO it is an incredibly tough loss losing your partner. Love, future, identity all gone in a flash. In your case looking after your young daughter, and as you say suddenly becoming a single mum which you never chose to be. It is all so incredibly unfair. You will find people in similar situations here with young children who have lost their parent.
We are all here for you. Keep chatting and we will keep listening.
Tried to write some words of comfort but nothing I can say will ease your pain right now.Everyone on here will be thinking of you and sending love. So sorry for your loss.
I’m so sorry for your loss, my partner had a sudden cardiac arrest on 20 January, the paramedics worked on him a long time, but he couldn’t be saved. I’m so sorry you’re having to go through this too. This site has been a real comfort to me. Keep posting and take all the help you can to support you both. We are all here for you.
I am so sorry for your loss. My husband died suddenly 6 months ago from a heart attack. It’s a shock I did have flashbacks backs for quite a while afterwards.They have now stopped. None of wanted to be on this journey. You will find some lovely supportive people on here . We all understand what we are going through. I glad you have some good support around you . How brave of your daughter flagging the ambulance down . Take Care
So sorry to hear of your loss, it is a truly painful time as I know only too well. Take one day at a time, try not to look into the future, be kind to yourself and rest as much as possible, grieving is so exhausting and being able to sleep difficult too. Sending you strength and hope to get through, you are stronger than you think.
