I lost my soulmate jimi after just a few months from our 50th anniversary. I lost him 10 months and 3 days ago and i am struggling so much i just dont want to wake up in the mornings and pray to god each and every night to take me out of this nightmare im living with. There is no help no hope im so tired of crying every day . I miss him so much
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Hello @Shirl55, I am so sorry for the loss of your soulmate Jimi. I have made your post into a new thread so you can get the support that you need. Take care 
Hello Shirl
So sorry to hear that you are struggling. It certainly is a hard road to travel. I thought I had found my Happy Ever After too, sadly he died 4 months ago, we had been married for 16 years.
I have found this site to be a bit of a turning point, lots of understanding and support when I most need it.
Some days are better than others, but nights are still hard, and waking up each day and remembering what has happened is still a bit of a shock.
Hopefully, the better days will start to outnumber the worst days for all of us.
Sending love and hugs.
Xx
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Hi Shirl.
I lost my wife of 55yrs back in April,this road we are all on is a nightmare,I was genuinely deep in the depths and was inconsolable,
In recent weeks thanks to the good people on this forum I have managed a smile or two even a laugh,come hold our hands we will try and help.
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I lost my husband 3 months ago, just 4 days before our 40th anniversary. We had been together since I was 17 (I’m now 60) It has been the worst experience of my life but I am now starting to have some good days. I am trying to see something positive in each day, whether that’s something amusing one of my grandchildren says, or something kind, like my friend making some soup for me (I currently have covid) a take care of yourself and be kind to yourself too
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My husband died 12 weeks ago after 55 years together and I didn’t think it would be possible to carry on without him but here I am slowly getting myself into some sort of new normality. Do I like it? definitely not. Am I happy? Not yet. I can say though with the help of loved ones and you lovely people on here I am getting better days and I feel I’m beginning to live again rather than exist. X
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Hello Shirl, I am so sorry for your loss and how you feel. I lost my husband 11 months ago in difficult circumstances and like you I just can’t come to terms that I will never see him again. Life is just an existence and all I do is try to get through the day hour by hour and never a day without crying.
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I find telling my husband about what I’ve been doing helps. But i still find every day difficult, 9 months now.
I write to jimi every day but it doesnt help. I kiss his picture every night and talk too him all the time. I am just so angry that he dared to die on me when he promised i could go first.hospital cock up and neglect killed him so why do i feel it was my fault. Maybe if i had shouted louder they would have listened to me. They just didnt take any of my concerns seriously. Maybe i could have saved him but i couldnt and feel like its all my fault
So sorry for your loss. Of course it isn’t your fault; you mustn’t blame yourself. It’s such a hard road we’re all on. Sending hugs.
Thank you it helps im not alone and other people feel the same. Big hugs back
Shirl xxx
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Thank you nala sometimes it feels like your the only one going through this and im not. Its just some people say i should be coping with better by now. Not true is it
Shirl xx