Lost my wife

Coping with bereavement
#1

I lost my wife to cancer in june this year, we were together for 27 years and would have had our 20th wedding anniversary 7 weeks after she passed away, its been so tough trying to get through even the basic daily things, but every day feels like it gets harder, im in bits most of the time, i have family and friends who talk to me but when im in the house i feel so alone.

#2

Hi Mike

So sorry for your loss

I’m a bit further on the journey as my beloved hubby died last December

I’d like to say it gets easier but as one post said, the gaps between the raw pain do become longer
I still cry most days and miss him so much but I am living again / functioning.
I get up, walk my dogs, go to work/ look after grandchildren, eat, shop….but There is such a huge void.
Wow it hurts

Thinking about you
Keep posting and reading
Here you will never be alone

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#3

Hi rowans, thank you for your kind words, my wife taught me a lot about life, like how to cook, clean the house, look after money and myself, but she couldnt teach how to cope if she wasnt here, somedays it feels like i have no life left.

#4

Mike
Your wife was a wise lady teaching you to ‘cope’ without her but living is different to surviving.

As many have remarked our lives never go back to how they were so we have to find a different way to live. That is easier said than done

So called ‘friends’ tell us what we need to do, to start living again - join the WI, book club, go to the pub and whatever but not easy without our partner and personally none of their suggestions are me.

So we survive day to day and slowly we have to get used to the empty house and walking alone but it is hard.

This group has really helped me through the bleak times. Just knowing how I feel is ‘normal’ and OK

#5

Thank you for your kind words, i will do my best, for her .

#6

I’m in the same crappy boat, my wife passed away on 14 February after a very short illness (just over a month) with Cancer. I feel exactly the same as you, brave face at work and with friends but at home I am so lonely. It’s hard, very hard and I am dreading Christmas and what would have been Rachel’s 51st birthday next Wednesday.

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#7

Yes im the same about Christmas, it was her favourite time of.the year, im so glad i will have my family and friends around me so hopefully it wont.feel as bad, have you got somebody around you rusty ?

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#8

Yes I have a 24 year old son, who is going to his girlfriends this Christmas and I have great family and friends all of which want me to go to them for Christmas! Like your wife, mine loved Christmas and had a tree in almost every room! I just can’t think about that and really want to just hide away. However, I have decided to accept a Christmas Day lunch invitation, so it’s something different. The Christmas season without Rachel is going to be dreadful.

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