Lost mum my everything just before xmas and feel im getting worse. I was her carer 24/7 and feel loss, guilt at not saving her, blame myself. Dont want to live on to be honest

Hi pam,
I’m sorry for the recent loss of your mum. My mum died suddenly in june of a severe bleed on the brain. She was funny, kind, and active and we lived together and did everything together.
The shock has been awful and I too have felt like I havent wanted to live at times. But I have a partner and a 12 year old daughter and I have had to keep going.
Our mums would be so devastated to see the impact their deaths have had on us. Have you got support in family and friends?
It may help to see your GP too?
I had 6 sessions of bereavement counselling. I dont feel it helped much but I gave it a go. Take things hour by hour, then eventually day by day.
You will get there.
Cheryl x

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Hi Pam, I’m sorry for the your loss. I lost my Mum suddenly of a heart attack and pneumonia just over four months ago.
I lived with Mum and was her full time carer for 23 years. To say I feel lost would be and understatement. Mum’s death has turned my life upside down and at times it all feels overwhelming. During the early days I hung on by my nails. It does get better. You’ve just got to allow time to pass.
Do speak to your GP, if you feel you are not managing.
Also come on this forum and get things off your chest when you feel you are struggling. We will all get through this. Take care

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Hi Pam2,

I’m so sorry to hear about your mum. It sounds as though things are very tough and you are feeling really overwhelmed.

I think you could really do with some support and I’m glad that you’ve been able to talk about how you’re feeling here. There is lots of other support out there, and I would really encourage you to reach out and speak to someone about how you are feeling.

The Samaritans are always there 24/7 if you need to talk about anything that’s bothering you (116 123, or jo@samaritans.org).

You can also make an appointment with your GP and ask to be referred to counselling or other support services in your area.

You deserve care and support so please, Pam, get in touch with one of these services. If you are at risk of harming yourself, please call 999, go to A&E or contact your GP for an emergency appointment immediately.

Take care,

Online Community team