I lost my son 3 weeks ago, im just kinda going with the flow with arranging his funeral, but inside im dying. I don’t have any friends or anyone I can really talk too, I dont think that its really hit me yet, as i refuse to believe that im not going to see his smiley face again :sob:

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Dear Jo69. My heart goes out to you as I lost my daughter 10 weeks ago and like you the time leading up to the funeral was like being on autopilot and yet I am still haunted and in disbelief as you are and the pain is unimaginable. It feels too big to get my head around. I am also so sorry you are alone and whilst there are so many kind people here who can understand what you are going through getting support is really important. The is not something you should go through on your own. Paul x


Thank you Paul. X

Hello all - yes I agree with Paul , get as much support as you can. Check out the info Sue Ryder offer. I signed up with Cruse and they were a life saver for me literally. I got lots of booklets from Compassionate Friends and they have a free lending library which i have found helpful. I lost two sons, one in september 21 and my youngest son. 10 weeks later. It is truly heartbreaking and i am still struggling but as they say " take one day at a time" is very appropriate. Try to eat but please drink lots and lots of water . In the beginning i just forgot to drink and ended up in hospital with dehydration, I am sorry that you have all had to join this community as only loss brings you here, but you will find people who understand and have lived through and survived this tragedy. I wish you all strength and peace. Jxx

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Hi jo69 - only just seen your post. I am so sorry to hear about your loss. It’s devastating. I lost my daughter at the beginning of last year. I was overwhelmed with shock and trauma. My whole family fell apart. The best thing I did was to get outside help. This website and contacting Compassionate Friends and getting counselling all helped me. It broke the isolation and made me realise I’m not grieving alone. Nothing can ever make that loss ok, but it’s a bit of a comfort to know that all the overwhelming waves of pain don’t last forever, they do eventually abate and they are ‘normal’. It’s grief. It’s trauma and it’s shock. Everyone’s different, everyone struggles. For me that outside support felt and still feels like a lifeline. Slowly, slowly and with many ups and downs it is possible to learn to live with it, not perfectly or in a straight line, but better than the bleak, darkest early months. Xxxx

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