It’s now a week since my wife died as I held her hand. I don’t know if being here can help but I feel totally lost without her. Our home has become an empty box to live in.
Hi @Den2611 . We all remember how it feels in these first few weeks, with thoughts hammering around, and feeling that our hearts have been ripped out! As impossible as it seems, battle through it but be assured the emotions ease as you move into the next part of your life. It will take a few months, so try to let it just happen.
Sorry to hear this. You’re certainly in the right place for people to understand you and what your going through.
The early days are so raw and painful and just getting through each hour is hard. Please keep talking on here as there is a lot of support on this site.
Den…I did the same thing 14 weeks ago…me and Sandie were as one for 50 years…I can’t tell you it gets easier after my time…it doesn’t…but I can tell you for sure you will treasure the fact you held her had while she went…that is priceless coz so many people on here didn’t get to do that…so really hold on to that my friend…I do every day…
@Den2611 I’m so sorry for the loss of your dear wife. I lost my wife of 47 years in October as I held her hand. The grief at the beginning can be overwhelming and everyone here will recognise any emotion you go through. You may also feel intense physical pain. I’m six months in and it is a little easier but it is a hard road and we are all different. As you start this unwanted journey post as you need. We are all here to support each other.
@Mike75 @tykey @UnityMan @Den2611 @Ali29 and everyone else. Today has been a really bad day. We should have been going on holiday to Gran Canaria. My children and grandchildren have been so lovely. We went to my son’s how to survive a meal together and watched a recording of my husbands funeral. It was a joyful service and the children laughed and cried as only children know how. No i am home alone. Normally we would have talked about our wonderful family bu all i can do is cry. I lnow i am lucky to have them as i know so many on here have no family but i miss my love so much. 51 years together since we were teenagers . I don’t know to survive without him. Sending love to everyone who is lost.
@Freefaller So sorry you’re having a bad day. The funeral was only last Wednesday so everything is still so raw. All of us will know how overwhelming grief can be at this stage. Let all your emotions out and however you feel will be what is right for you. I was with my wife for 50 years, married for 47. It is a lifetime together, like me, you will miss your loved one and wish none of this had ever happened. I’m 6 months in and some things are easier and the physical pain has lessened. Be kind to yourself. Hugs xxxxxxxx
@Mike75 thank you so much for your reply and understanding. My best friend has just sent me a WhatsApp with a 13 or 26 mile charity walk in South Devon in September. Her mum recently passed away, from Alzheimers and my mum recently diagnosed with Alzheimers. It has kindled a focus for me and i think I’d like to train for it. Im hoping this will help me with my trauma from a sudden death from cardiac arrest of my husband .
@Freefaller A charity walk is a good idea as it sets you a goal, a purpose, exercise and support from your friend while you tackle the roller coaster of emotions of grief and trauma from your sudden loss. Sending you love and support xxxxxx
@Mike75 i think, so too. I have cried and railed against God today. I don’t understand why he took someone like Pete. He was a good man who put everyone else first. I just don’t understand. It’s been my worst day yet. So many tears on this roller coaster.
Yep it feels so empty doesnt it ? My house feels empty still even now nearly 5 months on but you do get used to it a bit ! I had to buy a puppy because i couldnt stand the emptiness ! Shes lying here next to me now x
Thank you for your kind responses. I had a 45 minute session with a psychiatrist this morning which helped a bit at the time and hopefully more in the future. And this afternoon I was at the bank to freeze her bank accounts until the will is dealt with. And details of the funeral are slotting into place.
I know the road ahead is going to be long and painful but after really struggling yesterday, I feel slightly better today.
Aw … you poor thing ! Yeh i been bad in last few days ! Think its bank holidays … hits home theyre not here ;( xx
@Deb5 and everyone. Bank Holidays are hard aren’t they? Although every day is hard. My family are back to work now, so today has been lonely. Ive busied myself doing paperwork for finances - a grim task in itself. Thinking of everyone in this awful situation.