Oh @Mike75 Diane’s bench is beautiful, and such a lovely spot to sit and reflect. Thank you for sharing the photos with us. Love and hugs xxx
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Amazing @Mike75 you did your girl proud…
Xx
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Didn’t know you could do this! So beautiful… xx:two_hearts:
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Thank you.
I found out by chance through a page on Facebook when my dad passed (have a heart with flowers from his service) … it is a lovely way to preserve the flowers.
The lady did my husbands i found on Etsy and she did an absolutely amazing job.
When it is my time i am requesting that these flower tributes are placed on my coffing (including my dads) instead of a real floral tribute, along with the ‘rubber duck’ my husband ordered for me months before he passed, was delayed, (it arrived the day he passed)
I have a duck teddy made from my dads clothes too x
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Do you have a link for the page please
This is the link for the flowers:
For bears made from clothing:
Xx
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Thank you. Cwmbran isn’t far away.
Hello again Mike I have been in a complete turmoil of grief and haven’t collected my husbands ashes the lady in the funeral directors said she is looking after them until I am ready and feeling better.
As you may remember we were going to Hants or Dorset and the house sold 2 weeks before he died .At a later date the sale fell through and I m still trying to determine where to go or what to do.
It’s strange as I had been toying with the idea of putting a memorial bench for him at a local parade of shops.He is a Turkish Cypriot and used to go there for a natter and coffee with his friends who were cafe and shop owners there
I think it’s lovely what you have done and a great inspiration to me to go slowly and take one step at a time
Thank you Ann
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Where abouts is that mike ? And is it easy to do ? Do you need permission from the council ? X
Beautiful 
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@19Lefke95 Thank you for your kind words. I feel that grief is a sad and lonely place inside us which causes all sorts of intense emotions and turmoil and in dealing with this, we move at the pace that suits us as individuals. There is no right or wrong for all. I hope you are able to start to find some solace.
A plaque on a bench where friends can sit and remember him as they chat or eat their lunch keeps him in touch with his community and them with him. Already friends have arranged to visit my wife on their walks.
As for moving, if you are in turmoil and don’t have to do anything quickly take your time. I came from a holiday retirement area in Dorset and people moving there always expected it to be the same lively place in winter as it was in summer. It wasn’t and facilities weren’t always nearby. If you want help making up your mind visit the likely places at different times.
Love and support always xx
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@Deb5 It is in north Wirral.
You do need Council permission from their planning dept. The council here actually buys the bench and does the work so all benches are standardised. I just chose the spot and paid and the council did the rest so it was easy. You also get the plaque made separately and choose your own wording. The size of the plaque is also standard. They advise where you can place it. In urban areas there may need to be some local consultation with local residents for a new bench.
It is nice because it is a place I go to frequently so I feel with her more often.
xx
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Hello Mike
How true your words are as soon as you advised me weeks ago that if I moved my sadness would go with me and I gave it deep thought.I was born in Devon and grew up in Africa then did live for sometime back in Devon before I moved to London where I met my lovely husband.Moving to Dorset DevonHants anywhere like that would have been great together but on my own I will stick to my home area and the farthest will be into the Home Counties.
I love your wife’s bench and it gives a little purpose instead of the old enemy pointless.
Everything still is pretty much pointless .I had been sleeping fairly well from exhaustion but now I’ve entered a new phase I never sleep till 0400 hrs .How horrible it is because you can’t escape all the whatifs or I should haves
Annx
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@19Lefke95 Thank you and I am glad to help as I have found help here myself.
You are right, the what ifs and should haves are great tormentors but there is nothing that can be done to change them. Once you convince yourself of this, they fade and affect your grief less. I hope you find solace from this in your journey but it is still early. Love and support xx
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Oh i know the what if and the maybes 
i should have made him go to the drs earlier - i knew instinctively something was wrong but didnt know what ! Why didnt he just go to drs - he mustve known something ? But i think he was scared and now hes paid for it with his life … oh my poor husband 
do the tears ever stop ? X my sleep is very all over place and its only cos of my puppy i go to sleep so early but always wake up early too ;( oh life hey ! Not easy is it xx
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Thank you … i love them.
I think i will get another duck made from hubbys clothes … he and my dad were my everything! … when they say you marry someone like your dad, for me that was true! They were alike and my dad loved him to bits (big approval) … hubby, loved my dad to bits, always said he treated him more like a son than his own dad. X
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Aw … thsts lovely
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How lovely. Looks very professional.
Very inspiring and cute.
Love looking at it. Reminds me happy days when we used to look at the ducks before my husband died four months ago. We loved feeding them and watching them waddle over and lovely memories. Thank you for posting it
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Yes I have so many what if and if onlys too. But I agree it goes with you wherever you go and disorientation with me is the hard thing four months on. After knowing my husband half a century and now feeling old my memories now go back to when we were in our early twenties and we were different then and he was so doddery as an old man so weak before he died and for the last few years he just got worse.
I look back over how he used to be as each stage in his life a d mine enfolded. So many misunderstandings that with hindsight seem to be different. Life is as it is if course. The ups and downs. We made so many silly decisions and we did what we both had to do. We carried on and there were some very sweet moments. Fun times when we laughed and other times when we were not.
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