Over four years on, still living on memories.
Sat, as I do regularly, in the car, on Salisbury downs, overlooking the views, in the distance, tiny, the sun reflecting of its roof, the village church where my dearest darling lay.
The Downs, the place we first dated over fifty years ago. The place we took the children to play kites, football, frisbee, grass skiing on cardboard. The place, as she loved it, I’d take her even in her final days, to take the views, and have an ice-cream.
Now i sit alas alone, gazing on at the little church, seeing around me, younger generation, with there children Doing the same things.
Life can be so fast, unpredictable, sometimes cruel, but, thank god for memories…J
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I am three years in to this horrific journey and I still have only my memories to comfort me. Sometimes they do and sometimes they make me very sad. It took about a year to let the final memories fade as they were blocking out some of the happier times. August, September up until he died in October bring those sad sad memories flooding back. I too go to a quiet place and just sit and think about how things were. I am pleased that I am not young and have to live on for a long time. I am 75 this month and I comfort myself that there is more behind me than in front and it won’t be too long before we are together. If there is an afterlife then so be it but if not I won’t know anything about it. Win win situation. I want our ashes mixed together and have bought a place in the peaceful spot to see out eternity together. I hope your lovely place continues to comfort you for as long as you need it to and you can get to it by yourself. Take care
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Thanks Florence, your mind set, the same as mine. More Life behind than in front. I’m now seventy, I’m hoping we meet up with our loved one’s again, my friend a friar, convinces me i will. I shall be buried with my lovely wife at the church. Let’s hope he’s right, and we can spend eternity with them. Happy memories, take care…J
Although I have already scattered my husband’s ashes it is in the most beautiful place and we shared happy times and family holidays. One day we will be reunited on that beach to spend the rest of eternity enjoying the beautiful scenery and hopefully have family spend happy times playing around us.
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