Memories
By definition memories are ‘the retention of information over time for the purpose of influencing future action’. Memories are a build-up of life events, all sounds good doesn’t it?
The memory of seeing that person, the memory of how they smiled and laughed. A memory which used to be loud and vivid, has now grown faint and silent. As each day passes so do the memories.
But what they never prepare you for are the different types of memories. Some good and some bad, some happy and some sad.
And you definitely aren’t prepared for the sad memories, the sad build-up of these memories. Especially, the fact that they will never go away, always in your mind and always on repeat.
I remember…watching you smile and laugh, with a beam that lit up the room.
I remember…the smell of your laundry, a smell that was so familiar.
I remember…the warmth of your embrace, on a good day and a bad.
I remember…holding your hand for the last time.
I remember…watching you take your last breath before you stopped.
I remember…kissing your forehead for the last time.
I remember…the last time you told me that you love me.
All memories, some I want to remember and to have an impact on me. Others I don’t want to remember, some hurt too much to remember. And yet we don’t get to choose, if you take some you take all.
Memories to me are not so much a build-up of happy and fond memories. But rather of sadness and memories full of regret.
I’m sure your words will bring comfort to others. Giving this thread a gentle bump so others can share their thoughts too.