Lost mum to covid on 14th January… I’m lost, its like I’m in a fog, I live with my parents, I was extremely close with mum, we did everything together, I’ve no partner so my parents have always been my world. Now it’s just me and dad.
Dear Mim, I’m really sorry about your Mum, as an only child I know how you are feeling, I felt as if I was living in a constant fog with a large black cloud pressing down on my head, I also got paranoid about something happening to my Dad, it did start to improve after about 6 months, I still miss her but I’m coping now, nobody knows you or loves you like your Mum, sending love, Jude x
Thankyou for your lovely message…it was mum’s funeral today…I thought I was in some kind of nightmare…I live with my parents, and I’ve known no other but to see them everyday…I’m in denial at the moment… people say “move on now”…who wants to move on !!!..I want to go back…
Thanks again for your reply… take care yourself…
People who say move on, have absolutely no idea of what you are going through, ignore them, things will get better eventually, but do what feels right for you, take one day at a time and be kind to yourself, sending love Jude xx
I lost my mum on the 1st April to Covid. My family all live abroad and still haven’t been able to see any of them yet. There were just 8 of us in the funeral. Ten months have passed and I continue to cry as much today as I did in the beginning. She was my world and I can’t get over not saying goodbye or even seeing her at the end. We only knew for 3 days that she had Covid and then she died - I just miss her so much. Like you I dint think I will ever get over this x💔
Oh I’m so sorry for your loss Min. I’m an only child too and lost my mum to Covid on 26 November. Like you, she was my best friend and my world. People have told me too I should move on- I prefer the phrase move forward. Somehow it sounds less like I’m leaving her behind but I’m trying to carry on. Even that though is too difficult sometimes. I wish I had the answer or a magic wand for all of us but all I am able to do is take things day by day- sometimes hour by hour, sometimes minute by minute. Try not to project- my mum’s birthday is in March and their Golden Wedding in April but I try not to look to that at the moment and to focus on now. People say be kind to yourself- took me a while to understand that really- for me it means, only do what you can cope with- I find it tough to look at photos or bring up memories so for now I don’t. I spend time with my dad, walks and zooms with my friends occasionally. I find reading at night helps my mind to stop wandering and helps me to sleep. One of my friends is doing a thing with me where we text one thing we are grateful for every day and he makes me plan one thing to achieve.
Saying that, none of it is easy and lockdown is making it even harder and I’m sending you lots of fellow only child love and hugs. Xx
Thankyou for your kind message.
Most of what you said is totally how I feel…it’s a cruel emotion that humans must endure, and I really wish I had a switch to turn to off… someone said to me to only live in the moment your in, don’t think about the next hour, week, month, just live in the moment your in, this I find helps sometimes, I try to keep myself busy, but then feel guilty for that, anytime you need a chat, I’m here… thankyou again for your message…
Thankyou for your lovely message,
This covid has alot to answer for, …it’s a strange feeling isn’t it, and one that you never want to go through again, and being an only child, it’s hard.
I’m so sorry to hear about your mum, ironically it’s time’s like this the only person you want is your mum… anytime you want a chat, I’m here…
Same to you Min, any time. It certainly is strange and nothing prepares you for it. It’s pain like I’ve never known. We just have to keep putting one foot in front of the other and hope that time will ease the pain. People tell me you don’t get over it, you learn to live with it. Right now that seems impossible but at least we have places like this to share and support each other. I’m actually doing their online counselling just now as is my dad and the counsellors are lovely. Might be worth thinking about x